A regular column written by the Rockets Bear himself
October 3, 2002
Media day ruled! I don't know how many of you got to see pieces on the news about our media day on September 30. For those of you who didn't, it was exciting. It was so great to see some players back in Rockets uniforms again. The season is getting so close I can almost taste it. Players are at training camp, the dancers are back at practice, Turbo is pulling his mini-tramps out of storage and limbering up, Calvin is clothes shopping, Rudy has been sleeping at our practice facility, and as for myself? Well, I'm still getting fatter. It's hard work to maintain a 92-inch waistline. Go ahead, I challenge any of you to do the same. See how many gallons of honey it takes to be me.
The NBA mascot convention last week was all that and then some. Don't worry, there were no arrests this year. At least that is the story I'm selling. And a few of the mascots around the league are paying me dearly for it. After a friendly game of paintball in which I was shot exactly 357 times (my bruises are still healing), everyone hit the tables back at the hotel.
The Gorilla from the Suns lost five pounds of bananas at the blackjack tables. Hip-Hop from the 76ers lost eight carrots (not the diamond kind, but the food kind) on the roulette wheel. The Coyote from the Spurs lost two anvils and four sticks of dynamite at the craps table. G-Wiz from the Wizards got kicked off the slot machines for putting spells on the machines and making them release all their coins. The Bear from Utah fell asleep with the rest of the old people playing keno.
For those of you who don't know, the Bear is kind of over the hill and has so many injuries that he can't get around too easily any more. And Clutch, that's me in the third person, doesn't gamble. I can't stand the thought of losing any of my precious toys or honey for a cheap thrill. Clutch the angel, that's me!
Can't wait to see all of you this season. Remember the first home preseason game is October 15 against the Spurs at 7:30 p.m. I hope to see all of you there. In fact, you can get your tickets just by clicking here. Until next time, be funny!
P.S. Oh, by the way, "BE PART OF SOMETHING BIG!"
