The Young and The Restless

It was barely two years ago…Summer League in Orlando….that the Sez took flight…chronicling the fortunes of the Nets young guns, led by Marcus Williams and Josh Boone, which eventually led to the cartoon and all the fame (none) and fortune (none) that has come with the musings over the past two seasons…in truth, the blog at that time was supposed to be the thoughts of the then Travelin’ Man, and now the second coming of William Penn (that would be E.Stefanski-President of the New Millennium of the Sixers, for the uninformed), who was to provide the fans back home a sense of what they could expect in the fall…but being the dutiful PR servant to my mentor, I offered to take on the responsibility, and the rest, as some would say, is bad history…but that being said, it’s been a little while since we visited…and I’ve heard from the four people who consider themselves loyal followers (they could be considered the leaders of The Flock…but I digress) that the Sez has given up the rope…gone soft…traded in his laptop for the Ban De Soleil…more interested in ph than ppg…in crosscourt forehands than crossover dribbles…in designer sunglasses than cleaning the glass…and so as the champion Nets, led by Tom Barrise, arrive back in Jersey with their 4-1 mark (by the way, the entertaining podcast of Dante and Galante kept calling my man Baris-ee)…it was time for the Sez to shake off the Novocain recently administered by the team dentist and provide some perspective on the last few weeks…which lay rest to the misnomer called the off season…not this year anyway.

First, let me begin by addressing the man-child known as RJ…Richard to his friends, something else to the PR staff…the only player that I ever threw a clipboard at, who from the beginning of his tenure to the last week, took delight in pulling my shirt out of my pants at practice…whether it be a Tuesday in February, or the NBA Finals…The Prankster did not discriminate…but one of my former coaches, B. Scott, told me to remain calm in the face of The Prankster, keep my composure, and don’t throw anything that could injure…that would be, let see, a bad move…and so seven years later, Richard has moved on to Milwaukee…where I seriously doubt he will pull the shirt out of the pants of my Bucks counterpart…but you cannot be with a player for seven seasons, which included six trips to the playoffs and two NBA Finals, without feeling a certain sense of time gone by…and with Richard, that would be time spent in detention…but that was off the court…on the court, you could go to war with Richard…and I wish him only the best.

On the player front, we’ve already exceeded the PR budget for press conferences…first for the draft picks (more on them in a moment)…and then the international spectacular for Yi and Simmons (no disrespect to Bobby, but Yi is the last name, not the first…so we are symmetrical, if you know what I mean…but I digress)…and the free agent signings of Hayes and Najera…and what does this all mean…well, for the marketing mavens…one player who is Chinese (Yi), one who is Mexican (Eduardo) and one who is Cuban (Lopez)…can you say promotion?...and I spoke to the PA guy…he told me his goal is not to insult one billion Chinese as well as our neighbors south of the border…that is a very tall order.

As for the rookies…c’mon now…you didn’t see this coming…you did not see 4-1…and you did not see significant contributions from not one, not two, but all three players…Lopez down low…Anderson outside…and CDR all over the court…now I realize that the majority are passing this off as the summer rantings of a guy paid to sell…but tell me the last time you saw a player who had success in the league who did not have success in the summer…and, truth be told, vice versa…so what you saw should be very encouraging…not a guarantee, but an encouragement…an early validation of the strength of the 2008 draft process…the first for Thorn-D-Weghe…and I can see some of you smiling. You were ready to pounce, and now you have to reconsider. The beauty of basketball in July.

You Must be Nets….

The Food Network…Considering the Nets new international flavor, the media may think they visited the Disney World food court in the press room this season-use your imaginations….Freddie the K….The blogs that our veteran beat guy from the Post filed from Orlando were exceptional…I’ve pegged Charles Durning to play Kerber in the movie version of his life….Opening Act….Lost in the magnificence of Roger/Rafa at Wimbledon was the power and pace of Sister, Sister in the Womens’ Final…Venus and Serena were magnificent…even if you could care less about a rally or a volley…it was a great sports weekend….Dante and Galante….Superb week of podcasting from Orlando for the Magic duo…11 thousand emails would make the founders of Google proud…and they would read the Sez’s writings…outstanding….Arnie and Jack…Just finished the most recent book by Ian O’Connor on the lives of the two golfing legends…as someone who grew up watching, but not really understanding, the dynamics between the two men…the book is a must read…it is riveting in its detail…the Sez gives it three VC-3-3-3-3-3’s….Summer Fun…You know the nights are a bit tedious when the best thing on TV is the Law and Order marathon on USA.

Posted by Gary Sussman on July 14, 2008 at 3:55 p.m., ET

In the Heat of the Night

The days are getting longer, and hotter…soon to reach the solstice on June 21…not only the first day of summer, but the date of birth of both Derrick Coleman and Richard Jefferson (a little Nets trivia for you as we roast)…the Yankees and the Mets are stuck in neutral….the NBA Finals marches on (more on that later)…and the parade of college youth trek to the facility on Murray Hill to audition before the assembled Nets multitude (if you don’t know who they are…and call yourself a Nets fan…then why read further…even though after each Suz entry, regardless of the time of year, there are always the fans on the message boards who can’t stand the way I write…or understand what I write…so I ask…WHY READ….entertain yourselves with SLAM and call it a day….but I digress)….but back to the parade of college athletes…which is refreshing to see…players of all shapes and true sizes (rule of thumb…when you see a height listed in a college guide…subtract two inches)... going head-to-head to try and advance to the ultimate hoops showcase…and there have been some wild battles in the gym that Cal built ( I felt the need to reference one of my former head coaches, since we had both Joey Dorsey and Chris Douglas-Roberts from his Memphis Tigers in the house last week…but I digress)…now, I realize that you would like to know some of the behind-the-scenes…who looked good, who could do what, who had the true rep and who had the inflated balloon…but even though it’s June, I must constantly remind you of that one word that dominates The Bloggers psyche…tuition (did they have to jack it up another two grand…was the bursar not aware we failed to make the playoffs)…but I can tell you this…in one of the sessions, I thought I saw Kimbo Slice in the locker room getting ready …the players were clawing, diving, slapping, flapping, running, gunning, pushing, shoving, boarding and sweating…all looking to impress. And as Kiki has stated numerous times in his post-workout media sessions, one of the aims of these workouts is to see how the players perform when exhausted…who’s going to give up the rope…and who can summon that extra bit of reserve and move forward…who’s going to be able to function in the last two minutes of a game… and who’s going to take a pass…who can compete…and who will shrink.

So the process moves forward…and I know that the Nets faithful are looking for a hint…a nugget from these workouts…or on the trade front…or from the free agent wire…and all The Bolger can tell you is…be patient…The President and Kiki are hard at work…analyzing and interviewing…taking calls and making calls…doing their due diligence to make the team better…but since I have seen every workout…and every pass and dribble…and watched these young men go head-to-head ..I feel I have an obligation to give you something…a small slice of June…a morsel to ponder…and here it is…Kiki can still shoot. Keep the AC at 75!

You Must be Nets….

Three Million Dollar Man…Can’t my man Scal, the former People’s Choice, wear a suit…even if he doesn’t want to put on a tie…how about a nice jacket and dress shirt…with all the money that J Kidd made for him, he can buy his own Men’s Warehouse… Nets Classic…There’s a fan in Boston…front row…who would go nuts on every call…screaming and berating when it didn’t go his way…and he’s still courtside…standing and yelling at Kobe…so let me reflect and tell you there was nothing sweeter than seeing him sink back into his seat when your NJ Nets ruined his day in 2002…I got a real good look after Game 4, if you know what I mean…Black Mamba…That nickname is so good it should be trademarked…VC…The rehab is progressing very nicely…no complications…he’s still able to text at rapid speed…Password…Back on the air…if you’re a younger reader, you wouldn’t remember…Sunday’s at 8, Channel 2, with Regis…superb show…Jaba…I’ll pass…team gives me a good parking spot….Gas Attack…I was just wondering if the soaring price of gas will have any affect on the number of flashing lights patrolling the Route 17 corridor…even though they caught so many violators the other day at the Bendix Diner island, it looked like they were giving away free food…Top Chef….One of the highlights of having The Diva home from school is the variety of cuisine served almost every night…we recently set a Sez family record of no takeout for an entire week…and that little tidbit is more astounding than $4.00/gallon...Happy Father’s Day!

Posted by Gary Sussman on June 10, 2008 at 4:17 p.m., ET

I Know What You Did Last (Spring) Summer

The Blogger had become the Blah-gger…sentenced to hours and hours of watching, not participating in the playoffs…for the first time in six years…now, I am fully aware that, yes, All Things Must Pass…but did that mean big screen TV imprisonment had to include hours upon hours of ads for The Closer, The House of Payne and a guy by the name of Bill Engvall and his VERY FUNNY family (I would actually rather entertain the fans behind the bench in Philly than have to watch one more of these ads…but I digress )…and so for the first time since I had the pleasure of welcoming K-Mart to the Swamp as the Number One draft pick…(I killed the budget by flying in for Media Day a real Cincy bearcat…who bit his trainer prior to the festivities, leaving a nasty trail of blood on her arm …along with the Big O…who did not bite anyone and was very gracious…along with three cases of Skyline Chili…all to make Kenyon feel at home…which did nothing to stop him from yelling at me numerous times over the next several years… but he was never attacking me, just warning me…very sweet gesture…but I digress)….The PR guy and the PA guy were both on the outside looking in…who could write in the throes of hoops nausea…and then I heard the chirping from some very loyal members of The Flock…Matt the Night Stalker, the Nets fan who thinks he has a relationship with the Sez…John (you the) Schuh-mann from NBA.com…KC (and the Sunshine Band) Johnson from the Chicago Trib…Citizen Kane, the most famous resident of Ridgewood…and the lovely ladies from Kappa Kappa Gamma on the campus of Cornell, who wanted to know how The Diva got her nickname…the questions that inquiring minds wanted to know….did you take the rest of the year off?...did you pack it in?...were you feeling sorry for yourself?...has the Cartoon retired?...No to all…we just needed a little creative Red Bull…which brings us to the 20th of May…when The Blogger made a triumphant return to Secaucus and the Draft Lottery…a real-live smorgasbord of food, execs, players….and more importantly….material.

First, I would like to thank the league office for the schedule change…back in the day…anytime 1996-2001 BT (Before Thorn)…the Loser’s Ball was conducted on usually a beautiful afternoon…as in Sunday afternoon…as in another drive down the majestic Route 17…which made the experience even that much more tedious (unless you get that Numero Uno-that is a good day’s work any time, any place)…but in 2008, we make the trek to NBAE on a Tuesday night…a short treacherous drive (the Nets PR Director at the wheel-he’s had better days) from East Rutherford, all in the symmetry of the work day…that, my friends, is an outstanding effort by the powers that be…and unlike the past daytime experiences, the mood at 450 Harmon Blvd. was just what the hoop doctor had ordered…who needed the EC Finals in Beantown…give me handshakes from my friends in the league office…a hug from Doris Burke…a hello from John Martin of ESPN Radio…remembering back in the day when we were close with our national brethren….my fellow PR counterparts, who had to schlep all the way to Jersey from around the nation…while we got to make the seven minute drive….and two outstanding buffets under the tent in Secaucus!!!!

The stars were out…DWade …the Commish…Pat Riley…Larry Bird…Kevin Durant…and the biggest of them all…representing your New Jersey Nets….Jay Z….his security detail looked like it was on loan from the Cannes Film Festival…and when various scribes asked for an interview…I could tell them my contract only allows me to deal in letters A – W. But the atmosphere was electric…the league always goes first class…and after having to sit on the sidelines waiting for any connection with the outside basketball world for the last five weeks…it felt great to be back in the league….and the spread did not hurt…a few highlights…the opening buffet included salmon, chicken, pasta bar, assorted cakes and cookies as well as an entire snack basket of M&M’s, Oreos, etc…and that was before the event…because after the proceedings…an unexpected bonus…grilled cheese…chicken fingers…soft pretzels…pizza slices…what did you think….I was going to detail my intense discussions with the various media members on the state of affairs on Murray Hill?…let those that get paid for a living talk about the college players they have only seen on TV…the Sez gives you the essence of the night…which was an aroma that one must feel if trapped in the kitchen of Top Chef….yes, it was a superb evening…we didn’t lose any ground, as the President and Kiki will now attempt to find the Bo Derek of draft picks (for the younger readers, just Google the name…and then you’ll understand)…and the Blogger feels rejuvenated…let the workouts begin!

You Must be Nets….

Tiny Tim….And that is what VC has been able to do, throw away his crutches…Number 15 looking mah-ve-lous following ankle surgery…working diligently with Timmy the Trainer on his rehab…watching Timmy massage Vince’s ankle and leg is similar to viewing Ron Dutrow rub down Big Brown prior to the Derby….French Pastry…For the second year, our own Ian (Bird Man) Eagle will be on site in Paris for the French Open…Channel 217 on DirecTV if you care…The French are not aware that Capriati once told Ian to be quiet several years ago when he was broadcasting her match at a tourney in Mahwah… Al Gore, please….Playing tennis the other night…outside...middle of May….48 degrees…no feeling in two fingers…did I miss the press release on global warming?.... Kiki….Since we talked last, the former Bruin promoted to GM…congrats on the move, and there will be no nickname…I can’t do better than Kiki….Travelin’ Man….And yes, the Blogger still communicates with the present King of Philly…who had no problem in contributing to my misery at not making the playoffs… which will cost him in a very large dinner bill on our next visit to his pit of Brotherly Love….It is High, It is Far….It is a mess!...HBO…In the spirit of good sportsmanship, I wanted to let you know that ‘Entourage’ will not be on air until September…probably wanted to make sure than Turtle could bring Kobe in for a guest shot….Parting gifts….Good luck to The Teardrop on his next career move…Mark was always a pleasure to deal with in his three years with YES, and I’m sure wherever he winds up, he’ll always be able to shop till he drops…Bada Bing…It’s been a little while, and we all miss Tony and the boys (and girls)…so as a PSA…the brown Caddy still sits outside the club…but is now missing a right front hubcap…I was told you can go inside and call Triple AAA….Recession…Due to the price of gas, I have asked all the women in my house if they can car pool when they go to get their nails done…sweet!!!!

Posted by Gary Sussman on May 21, 2008 at 10:37 a.m., ET

All Things Must Pass

And so after six glorious seasons of playing into June, and May and even late April, the most successful run in Nets history has come to an end...and even though many Nets fans (and aren't we all) are moaning and groaning, venting and lamenting, gesticulating and hyperventilating, this is no time to be down, to self loathe, to feel one with misery (if you want misery, may I present one of my former head coaches and his squad, the Memphis Tigers under the direction of Coach Elvis, who were on the precipice of national glory...but instead of looking out over the ecstasy of celebration, fell into the abyss...that, my friends, was misery...but I digress)...this is a time to sit back and reflect...The Sez has tried to quell your fears during this season of discontent, but in the words of The Great Tuna...you are what your record says you are...and so it's on to Secaucus...where it was not too long ago they had a permanent seat with the Nets logo attached...but all that changed...the draft choices plus the trade that turned the franchise in the north direction produced a chemistry on and off the court that was a marvel to behold...and then with all the changes...the playoffs were still on the menu...six straight...who would have thought that possible...but it happened...it was a great ride...and unfortunately, we ran out of tokens...but there is hope, there is optimism, there is a shining light in the President's office on the Jersey side of the Lincoln Tunnel...but that's for the people who get paid to keep you informed to detail over the coming weeks and months...what you need to do is just sit back, enjoy the warm weather, watch reruns of The Biggest Loser for inspiration...and reflect on what we have just seen.

I have attempted several times to list some of my favorite recollections...but it becomes to voluminous, and at this stage of the season, volume is not high on my list...but I will say in those first two years, there was a chemistry and camraderie amongst most of the fellas (if I said all then that would be, how would we say...false)...but certainly more than enough...and the results took the flock to rarified air...K-Mart rockin', Kerry flyin', J Kidd dishin', RJ jammin, VC flyin', Veal subbin', Toddly passin', Sweet Lou drainin', KVH bombin', Rodney swishin'...and on and on...from Deke to Jabari, to Twin and Z, to A-Train, JV and Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood...you know what...I can stand the lottery every seven years (I look at it as a plague...but I digress)...especially since they have now moved the unsealing of the envelopes to a weeknight, so The Sez doesn't have to kill an entire Sunday... Bring on the ping pong balls...give me a couple of draft picks...and save The Sez a place at the pasta station...the NBA Lottery Buffet, where amazin' happens!

You Must be Nets....

Sounds of Silence...Nets officials can't discuss any underclassman until they officially declare for the draft...which should be April 27th...and then Kiki will be like Clapton...unplugged....Philly Cheesesteak...Rumor has it that city officials are debating renaming the Ben Franklin Bridge the Ed Stefanski Bridge...You Can't Handle the Truth...The women coaches are far more forthright than their male counterparts in the walkoff interviews in the NCAA's...and if you didn't watch...Candace Parker...pre-t-t-y good....Dorothy, you must be in Kansas...I am very proud to say that I did pick the Jayhawks to win it all (even though I was brutal in the pool overall)...but as a Nets employee with closets of free gear, I was rooting for my man Cal to climb the ladder after the final buzzer...and knowing my former head coach, he would have had the ballboy cut the net for him....Road Kill...Final multi-day road trip of the season includes the garden spots of Cleveland and Milwaukee (Toronto, besides the VC obsession, is a beautiful city)...and the home of the Rock N' Roll HOF did not disappoint...at shootaround on Wednesday...fresh bird droppings on the court...the howling from the fellas could be heard back in Secaucus...Maple Leaf...And on The Sez's continuing battle with Toronto TV...on Thursday, only showed the first half of the TNT double dip...must have felt the ice was going to melt before they got to the hockey highlights....Battle Zone...The other night on the jewel of a road called Route 17....bridge construction...two major accidents within a mile of each other on 17 south....six different cop cars flashing...this has to be the closest thing to driving in Baghdad....Yankee Baseball...If the injuries continue, they may want to petition the league to use 10 fielders....Puck-er Up...Let's see...the Devils and Rangers played eight times during the regular season...and may play seven more times in the playoffs...these guys are really going to hate the smell of each other....and by the way...after all the experimentation...all you needed to watch hockey on TV....HD....it's so clear you can see the smoke emanating from Double L's suite...Baskin Robbins....Nets last game of the season will be seen on YES-extra...which doesn't really exist...but is created when the Yanks and the fellas clash...and Channel 9 says not tonight...which they did on the 17th...seems that night is also the season premier of the new Flava Flav series...if we made the playoffs, rumor has it we would have been bumped for the premier of the Pee Wee Herman Story....Big Red-Ink...I would like to thank the keepers of the Ithaca Ivy for another $1000 bump in tuition...spoke to a sweet lady in the bursars office...told her she could take it from my playoff share.

Posted by Gary Sussman on April 12, 2008 at 9:44 a.m., ET

10

So we have come to this....a Phil Rizzuto from the end of the campaign...and The Sez has tried to be there for you...from the Hunt for Red October....thru the Marverick Revolution....and now to spring break...and what do we have?....it's fast....it's hot...it's high flyin'.... and it's not underage....it's....NETS GONE WILD!!!!!!!

C'mon now Nets fans (and aren't we all)...we all want to make the playoffs ( and please, to all the scholars who post on the various message boards that it would be better not to make the Elite 8 in order to get a higher draft pick...and discontinue a run that only four teams in the league can boast...which right now is six consecutive seasons playing when everyone pays attention...exactly what is the downside of the playoffs...too much entertainment outside the 'Zod...but I digress)...and the Little General has the sweats at night (by the way, lets get something else out of the way-I am particularly fired up today-the head man of the Cubanos was a floor general, thus he gets the title Little General from his playing days...but my man, my Jersey guy, learned at the towel rack of the hoop Patton, The General-RM Knight-the sweater maven...so he has also earned the moniker...if Mariano and Wagner can both play the same song, then we can have two LG's-which is also another shout out to the sponsor at the top of the page...who has showered The Sez with parting gifts...but I digress).... back to my Little General...who has nightmares of the Washington Generals...but as we chase the 8th...your Nets have become Phoenix East!!!

This is what you have been waiting for...points...and more points...and then some more points...these are not your Daddy's Nets...when a jump shot was met by a bang and clang...but no more...we just dish and swish...pick and pop...screen and roll...and most of all...run and gun....pull up from five...pull up from 10...pull up from 20...as Lou Costello would say (use Google search for the younger readers)...'It Doesn't Matter!!!!....Milwaukees Finest going end to end....goal to goal...belly to belly(Opening Day is Monday, in case you forgot to watch Yankeeography)... VC soarin'...RJ flyin'....Boone jammin'...Boki, the Slovenian Sniper...Nenad, the Serbian Sensation....and add a little Diop in the Bucket!...

You have dreamed of this day...Showtime is back...and Bo Derek will be signing jerseys on Saturday night!!!!

You Must be Nets....

The Candidate....Mark Jackson had so much press around him pregame at the Garden I thought he was running for Mayor...and the Teardrop told The Sez that if he should coach anytime in the future, his first hire will be Walter Berry as his SWAT coach....Tiger, Phil....and The Bird?....Sez newsroom has learned that the Nets Endangered Specie will build a nest at Amen Corner the second weekend in April, as Ian does Augusta for DirecTV...no word if Spanarkel will try to play in the Pro-Am....Hello, Paris....Will someone please call the party animal and have her ask her family to upgrade the TV's in their hotels...do I really need to watch the NCAA's on a set from 1982?....Bada Bing....Just and update for you...the brown Caddy is still in the lot...over a year now...but there was a cop car next to it this morning....I think the least the employees could do is give it a good wash....Dancing with the Stars...The move when Devin splits the double team...sweet!...God Save The Queen...The Sez headed to Europe in October...Eiffel Tower...Roland Garros...Big Ben...Wimbledon...Do you think they read the blogger in Buckingham Palace? Do I bow if I meet Prince Charles?....Can I invite Frederic Weis to the team dinner?...this trip, my flock, will be priceless.

Posted by Gary Sussman on March 28, 2008 at 10:49 a.m., ET

Devin Sent

Let's count the point guard ways...running a one-man fast break...throwing the showtime lobs...giving up his body...diving on the floor...displaying the toughness of a winner...is the Sez throwing bouquets to the traded?...oh, so sorry, you can read more about him in my book...no, those are the traits of the tradee, the prime real estate in the new foundation being developed by the firm of Thorn and (Find A) Weghe...apparently, for the uninitiated, it does take a few games to acclimate yoursleff to your new mates, even though the masses would like a seamless transition (since most of the readers have never been traded...maybe fired, but not traded...so the closest the writing staff could come up with was going from middle school to high school...how did that first week work out?...but I digress)...and after coming off a brutal trip to the land of fine eats and tough hoops...when the new guy could have taken the path of least resistance...the Swamp faithful are treated to a two-game display of hoops that made Nets fans (and aren't most of us) think back to...ok, let's not carried away just yet, but there were some familiar sightings in the Land of Zod.

Runnin' and gunnin', dunkin' and thumpin'...was that KK and K Mart flying down the floor?(you can see the current Nugget on Friday, in case you forgot what he looked like..but I digress)..no, this was the 2008 version...RJ still flying...but like Santa's reindeer...here comes J Boone...and VC....and Boki...and whoever else is on the floor...the break coming in waves, applying pressure, forcing the action...and then, just like their successful forefathers, taking the hit...in fact, not just a hit, but a full roundhouse to the jaw...like Frazier on Ali at the Garden ( for the young ones in the crowd, get the DVD)...first The King...did you know he's only 22...what were you doing at 22...and then Carlos (don't call me Emerson) Boozer...The Beast of Burden...40 plus...back to back...belly to belly (opening day March 31)...but the fellas would not fold...would not quit...would not make an excuse...and you know what...it started at the point...just like it had...and just like it will be. Light a Cuban cigar...sit back in a Hollywood seat...and listen to one of the great songs in the history of musicology...Led Zeppelin...with a distinct Nets flavor...we call it the Stairway to Devin.

You Must be Nets...

Clinton Library...Bird Man and Sparky headed to Little Rock for their annual NCAA bonding...11 years together...Ian's kids refuse to call Jim 'Uncle'...Pairs Competition...The Sez research department has uncovered these former college radio teams…Fordham- current Nets play-by-play virtuoso Chris Carrino and analyst Mike Puma, now of the NY Post...and at the University of Maryland...current Nets' YES producer Frank DiGraci as the lead voice...with his analyst, now Daily News hoops maven Frank Isola...I pay my staff well...Tiger...Houston going for 22 in a row...and you felt the need to see what was taking place on the links...as he needs to make a putt on 18 to win...again...and he makes it...again...which justified my changing the channel in front of six people who only wanted Kobe...California Dreamin'...Big Red flying west to take on Stanford...what was the selection staff thinking-a 14/3 upset, or a comparison of SAT scores...Good Knight...Need to call my friends in Bristol and find out if the Little General's mentor is having a good time on the set...and if I can get some of those sweaters...Bar Mitzvah Boy...That would be my good friend Mitch, the proprieter of Hoop One, who looks forward to this weekend with his eyes wide open, and his face in a permanent grin...because Mitch is the guy who supplies almost all of the men and womens NCAA teams (don't miss the word all) game tapes of their opponents...think of it this way...it's tax season, and you're the only accountant...Mitch is so grateful he flies his dad up from Florida to run the register...Who Knew...Game of the Year...Nets/Hawks...March 19...just like you also knew that Yao would get hurt and his team would never lose again.

Posted by Gary Sussman on March 17, 2008 at 9:29 a.m., ET

O-fer

I was present...I was a witness...I was not a participant (no post game interviews)...and in keeping with the need to always include a baseball reference during March...the road trip could be categorized as the following: Spurs- groundball back to the pitcher,Grizzlies- strikeout (caught looking-full count), Hornets-ground ball to short, Mavs-foul tip, third strike, and the Rockets-three swings-another K. No reason to belabor the point...the flight home was smooth, The King on tap on Wednesday...and the days are longer. So let's move on to the true essence of the adventure into the great Southwest, as we present the following thoughts on how The Sez celebrated Daylight Savings Time, in another installment (the barbeque, salsa and gumbo version) of....

You Must be Nets....

Rodeo Drive...Flight to San Antonio was so rocky that TV's Beadle prayed to both her employers...YES and People.com...swore to never say another bad thing about Britney if the plane would stop swooshing...pre-game spread was impressive...and the thought that kept crossing my sometimes furtile imagination was that we are in cow country...where they fatten their animals for future rewards...and when you visit the Spurs, who are almost invinceable at home, you get they feeling that they are just fattening the opponents for the eventual results...even though I didn't see anyone in the press room wearing a jersey....Elvis was not in the building....Atmosphere at the Fed Ex had all the trappings of a preseason game...not a good situation when the town just waits for the next time Cal and his troops take the court....highlight of the overnight-former Net Jason Collins staying at the same hotel as the team... so if that was the only highlight, you have a problem....but it was a new hotel, so the freeloaders (such as the Blogger) had no reason to complain...A-Paul-ing...Need to find dinner near Bourbon Street...hook up with Leroy the Security Guy...street smart former NYC detective...who had recently stayed in the area on league business...go looking for eats...Leroy says up here, down there, over hill, over dale...we walk for 30 minutes...and end up at the restaurant...which, if one had walked out the back door of the hotel, was within free throw distance...didn't ask him if he was asssigned to desk duty while on the beat...at the arena, the beat goes on for Byron's guys...reminds the Sez of the Nets back in the day (2001-03)...and the point guard, in the words of L David...pre-t-t-y good....Kittles in the house...but since he couldn't stick the three or run the floor, he falls into the Twin category...ex-Net seen on the trip....JR Ewing...Personal highlight...played tennis with my former longtime partner, who has relocated to Dallas...and we were kicked off the courts for a park and rec clinic...just like at home....outstanding...Personal lowlight...the pr seat at the press table felt like I was sitting in a classroom at the local elementary school..complete with the two kids next to me who were jumping up and down like it was recess...and my thoughts on the media circus...that J Kidd was certainly chatty, wasn't he?....you can read the rest in my book....Oprah Book Club...And on the subject of books...long trip, another successful reading venture...went fiction, which is unusual for The Sez..."The Appeal" by John Grisham...my review...I think Grisham has a future...two Joey Crawford bobbleheads up....Houston, we do not have a problem....Asked Deke if he was going to play till he was 50...thought I asked him if he was 50...and he laughed...and then you wonder...didn't he used to play for us?....but the trip did close with an outstanding press room buffet, complete with some type of bread pudding...which I don't think I'll see on 'Top Chef'.....The Long and Winding Road...And the trip always must conclude with the ride up 17 in a mental fog...and the question begs...who are these people that call to talk Mets at 4:15 am?

Posted by Gary Sussman on March 11, 2008 at 3:30 p.m., ET

Texas Primary

So here we go...the race is on, as the fellas travel to the great Southwest, where many have said the votes will be cast regarding the remainder of the campaign....but as we negotiate the tolerance for beans, The Blogger is not looking for Eva...or Tony...I want to see Hillary...or Barack...or even Bill for that matter....this is where all the action is on the second Super Tuesday...and since Matt Winick thought it would be great for team morale to play the defending champs back-to-back and almost belly to belly (by the way, all those theories that since the President worked in the league office the boys from the Swamp get some slack...how's that working out right about now...but I digress)...would it be too much to ask for a few celebrity sightings while we do battle in the Land of Salsa...which leads me to the true essence of this trip through the Triangle...with stops to see Elvis and Byron...forget Bruce or Bon Jovi...this is the true Jersey renunion tour, as The Sez gets set to break bread (or since we're in Texas...a taco) with all of the former fellas who no longer have to avoid The Blogger during media availability.

We start off at the now AT&T center....the site of the first Nets NBA Finals wins as well as the lead through three in Game 6 (don't get me nuts...the trip has just begun...but I digress) and the home of JV...Rock-Jacque-Jayhawk...always smiling...always clean...and one of the nicest gentleman you will find in any walk of life...from there it's on to Graceland...where on an earlier visit several years back, the former Coach Cal and the present day Elvis made a pre-game entrance...sat at midcourt...and then left at halftime...beautiful...but where the FedEx is now home to Twin, aka Jason Collins, who is tended to by trainer Drew Graham, who learned his trade at the foot of the training table of our own Mr. Tim Walsh...then on to Mardi Gras and B-Scott, who looked better than the stars in his taliored threads on the sidelines at the All-Star Game....and after saying hello to the Kittles clan and various forms of gumbo, it's on to visit Jerry Jones...as well as my former Captain, 'Toine and Malik...always a pleasure to spend a Saturday night in Big D....I'm sure there will be love in the air...which is how we will proceed to our final destination...where the team plays the Rockets...but the Blogger is going to look for The Rocket....it is Houston...he lives nearby...how would that be for a sighting?....but in the arena, a hello to the former Net part-time center and now years down the road the new starting center for Tracy and Friends...Dikembe...Kon-Deke...who may be one of the five nicest men on the planet...who built...not went to the opening...or lent his name...but built a hospital in his homeland in honor of his mother. This is a great man. So the table is set...a little hoops...and looking for a Clinton....an Obama....and The Rocket (although Kellen Clemens would suffice). My plate is full. Enjoy the late games.

You Must be Nets....

Name That Tune...The PA guy appreciates all of the suggestions regarding the arena calls for the new guys...on the phone..on the web...even on the radio...I have listened...I have studied...and yes, I have even copied...bless you all....The Natural....Was that a debut for Milwaukee's Finest against his hometown?....and a two crossovers up to the fans who initiated the game ending chant...the Izod crowd getting creative...who knew?....The Big Red Machine...Stefanski,The Former Travelin' Man, crushed as the Big Red cop the Ivy for the first time in 20 years...talked to me for years as if Penn invented hoops in the league that plays on Friday and Saturday nights...so depressed that he had to go to Milan to avoid the calls from The Blogger...at least Ridgewoods own Citizen Kane, NBAE's Tim, former Princeton baller, took it like a man...sent his congrats to me and The Diva...we accept humbly...and point out that Cornell has everyone back next year...sweet!....The Father...The Son...and The All-Time Scorer....A huge Sez congrats to Taylor Barrise, son of my guy, Nets assistant coach Tom Barrise, who last week ended his scholastic career as the all-time leading scorer in Northern Highlands history...which will rank as one of the top moments in the family scrapbook, not to be outdone by his beloved Dad, who several years back, after hearing some disappointing news, firmly established his place in Nets lore by depositing all of his Nets gear that was in his car, most still in the dry cleaning wraps, on the tables in the lunch room...where the in-house vultures enjoyed the harvest...priceless....March Madness..The Bird Man and Sparky getting ready for the NCAA tourney with a superb broadcast of Texas and Texas Tech last Saturday...Ian and Jim have been together longer than Felix and Oscar....Beautiful Mind...Noted sports magazine listed an exhibition baseball game as one of the sporting events to watch during the upcoming week...how can a game that doesn't count played in March with players running laps in the outfield be a must-see?....Ohm meter....Good to see the fomer Nets beat guy in the house on Sunday...working freelance....which means he can now treat me to indoor court time....Fear Factor...The feeling one gets when your accountant stares at the computer screen to determine if you are the payer...or the payee...thankfully the kids are still deductions.

Posted by Gary Sussman on March 3, 2008 at 7:32 p.m., ET

Indy .500

In the grand scheme of things, this probably looked pretty good to Matt Winick when he was putting the schedule together last summer...Nets/Pacers...home and home...back to back...belly to belly (I think that at this time of year you must use at least one baseball reference or else you can't really capture the sports pulse of the metro area...p-l-e-a-s-e...since when did hardball morph into your corner 7/11... all talk 24/7 without time off for major holidays?...but I digress)..two recent rivals...fairly short trips...star power...what could be better?

Let's start on the court...no J's..O'Neal for Indy...and our recntly favorite J was getting fitted for a 10-gallon hat...and a Cuban cigar...but the fellas had a solid win over Chicago at home...and spirits were high...but the weather forecast was a bit ominous as we trekked to Newark at 3 PM for the 3:45 flight(my man Benner in Indy,longtime Reggie valet, had informed The Sez of some nastiness around 4)...so I wasn't suprised when we didn't lift off till 4:30 under pleasant skies in Jersey...which is the last time I will use the word pleasant in this entry...as about 45 minutes in...can you say shake, rattle and roll...I signed up for basketball, not being a test dummy in the space launch simulator...assistant coach Sully actually called Coach Smith in Chapel Hill and asked him if he could offer the pilot a full scholarship if he would ease the pain...and then when we finally do make it to the snowy plains of Indy...the bus driver says that we're stuck..can't get out of the airport...but trainer/travel secretary Mr. Tim Walsh blasted that baby to the RCA Dome.

Which brings us to Friday night...major storm at home...but things have mellowed in Indy...and after the L on the hardwood ( by the way, it appears that more people go to a Jose Canseco book signing that go to the Pacer games in Canseco...but I digress)the bus pulls up to the airport gate...and they won't let us in!...as we sit...and sit...for 20 minutes...and when we do get to the plane, I didn't know I had to bring my ice scraper from home to clean the windows...no de-ice..and why, you may ask...because the plane was not in the right area...but the Pacer plane was...are you kidding me?...is Oliver Stone in the control tower?..is this the true meaning of (Larry) Bird-rights?...whoever heard of home tarmac advantage?...as the Pacers fly, the Nets stew (well, truth be told, plenty of steak and pasta, no stew)...and I'm sure they made it to Jersey City in plenty of time to rest up for the Swamp matchup...but the stall tactics didn"t pan out...too much RJ...too much VC...too much Marcus...and the karma of Aaron Ross. Start your engines.

You Must be Nets….

Italian Job....So in last week's musings, The Blogger lamented his lost bag in Toronto, casting aspersions on the Loonies north of the border...how can you lose luggage on a charter?...and then, the bag shows up in my room in Indy...Assistant Trainer Reicher (aka Matt the sock guy) and his sidekick, Gary the equipment tool (aka Chris Moneymaker) actually found the bag in Jersey...and transported it to Indy to have a laugh on The Blogger...my response...a heartfelt congrats to Dumb and Dumber...Under the Capp....The Capper filling in on TV Saturday night, teaming with Marv for a spendid encore (I can't see it live, I'm busy)...gushed over a VC feed "It was like Tom Brady looking off his primary receiver"...magnificent...except Eli was stunned by the Patriot reference....Milwaukee's Finest...Devin resplendent in red velour Saturday night...asked him why he took out his diamond earrings...said didn't want to draw too much attention...I love this guy...Big (Bad) Red...Cornell ready to cop the Ivy...10-0...must be a big deal on campus...the older daughter was all over it...Fear Factor...By the way, do I need to hear an ad for sexual dysfunction on a Saturday morning while I'm listening to sports radio with the younger daughter in the car...how can I jump out the window and drive at the same time?...Tiger...Is he playing minature golf?...Two out of three...Amount of times the town salt truck has obliterated my mailbox during the last three storms...thankfully the mail didn't fall into the yellow snow.

Posted by Gary Sussman on February 24, 2008 at 7:32 p.m., ET

5...

So another Sez family tradition was in full swing…enjoying the tropical 20 degree temps and glorious assortment of snow flurries in the garden spot of Central New York…the home of the first place Ivy League hoopsters…the site of the annual Presidents Weekend chili cookoff…where slush is the equivalent of sod…downtown Ithaca, as the family unit (three women and yours truly…so to say things were tranquil would be like saying the SI swimsuit issue was available in elementary schools around the country) got together for a couple of days…and on the first night, I woke up in a sweat (the room a tad to warm for the Blogger’s liking), having dreamt that my Captain had left to have dinner with Jerry Jones…and that Keith was coming back to East Rutherford, where it all began…but I turned up the air, went back to sleep…and then awoke again…had visions of not only Keith, but Chris Gatling, Jim McIlvaine ,Gheorghe Muresan and Elliot Perry all returning to the Swamp…but luckily in the dream, when they former Netsies pulled up the to arena, they saw the name Izod Center, got confused, and went looking for Jamie Feick…except Keith, who went looking for his house in Franklin Lakes.

So the era has come to an end…and I will leave it to the prognosticators and castigators, commentators and soothsayers, to examine the Nets career of my Captain…but as someone who saw just about every minute of every practice and every game, a few snapshots of a Kidd at play…first day, first practice, first full court…dives headfirst after a ball going out of bounds…Hello?...this is not your daddy’s Nets….Sports Illustrated cover shoot…the one that looks like he’s walking on water…in the car on the way back (got to go on a lot of nice car rides courtesy of my Captain)…discussing the media attention…said to him, it didn’t seem that even though his was All-NBA ,he had ever received this level of recognition…and to my surprise, his answer…”Never”…The double OT win in game 5 against Indy, when he refused to let the team lose a game that changed the history of the franchise…Semi round, game 3 vs. Charlotte…collides with David Wesley…goes into the locker room looking like Arturo Gatti…he didn’t need a surgeon, he needed the Fight Doctor, Ferdie Pacheco…got stitched up and went back on the floor…and the next day, had any eye that only a mother could love…EC Finals…Hate spewing from the stands in Beano-Town (plenty of gas to go around from the blowhards)…win game 4 after the game 3 meltdown…and then clinch the crown in front of the Fleet faithful…who would trash #5 without mercy…and then ask him for his autograph….how about the famous bowling pass to Lucious, the half-court alley-oops to Kenyon…and his unforgettable Globetrotter display at the Garden, culminated by the no-look over- the- head touch pass to Richard for the jam…

After a while, we took his brilliance for granted…except for those who remember what it was like before he got to Jersey…and now, it’s time to go West young man…and then on to Bejing, which I have felt for some time would be his legacy…having never lost in international competition and hopefully leading the U.S. back to the top of the medal platform…as I have noted numerous times in these musings…for all Nets fans (and most of you are)…you will never see another like him again.

You Must be Nets….

Oh, Can-a-da…It’s bad enough you have to carry around the useless change, but a brief overview of 24 hours north of the border…let’s begin with a 2:40 am arrival…and then customs makes the team sit on the plane for another half hour…then traipse through the snow to pick up our luggage off a cart, then go through a customs check…and finally arrive at the hotel in the 3:35 am vicinity…which could only be topped by arriving home the next night and discover that the baggage handlers had lost my luggage…and then had to sit on 17 for 20 minutes at 1:30 am as the cops closed the road to allow some big rigs to park…but at least I had Coach Barrise in the car to keep me agitated… Lou Gehrig….Who said in that famous speech, that he was the luckiest man alive…can Keith gets seconds on that…and he didn’t even have to go to the convenience store and buy a lottery ticket….Superman…I actually felt that D. Howard could have worn a Batman outfit, which would make Gerald Green Robin….because as great as Howard was…you have to admit that blowing out the candle was pre-t-t-y good….Groundhogs Day…And one more thing about the land of the Maple Leaf…Vince hasn’t played there in more than three years…you’re all smart enough to fill out the rest of the sentence… One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest….After an intense two days with the women of the house, I am now an expert on America’s Next Top Model…I’ll take the small yellow pills, Nurse Ratchet.

Posted by Gary Sussman on February 19, 2008 at 2:23 p.m., ET

Curly

It came from beyond the three point line….after weeks of rehab… countless hours of running and jumping, biking and hiking, pumping and thumping, sweating and fretting…there’s been a Serbian sighting…and we thought all along the man they call Curly was preparing for battle against the best in the world in the land of the Swamp…not quite… it seems that all this time he was channeling Rod Benson…forget about the Eastern Conference…with all his free hours, Number 12 has turned his sights on The Cartoon…we know about the sweet stroke…the ability to spread the floor…the baseline spin…the tireless work ethic…that works well on the hardwood…and what a great sight it was to see him back on the floor…but it now seems that there is more to his game than first realized when he hit the Jersey Shore four years ago…because we now have Nenad in the Blogosphere…everything you wanted to know…and probably didn’t want to know…about this wild and crazy guy.

The Sez loves the comp…where else can you find out that a player likes to go to the mall in his spare time…or watches Tony and the fellas strolling into the Bada Bing…or that there is a three hour time difference between the West Coast and Jersey…I can deal with that…but if we are going to make this a match worthy of the UFC (or how about The Villages retirement community in Florida)…can we give my man a little love…like a title worthy of his contribution…with all due respect…Nenad All Access…toe to toe with The Cartoon?…he needs a marketing shooting coach (Thate can’t draw)…because there are pearls in the Curly narrative that cannot be duplicated…because this may be the line of the year (even though it’s only February)…”When I was playing, I would get recognized. Right now, nobody knows me. I’m just a tall guy”…Priceless!...Lose the vanilla…give my seven-footer some swirl with sprinkles…as we welcome him back…battling for the LG (Little General) and against the LG (another shameless plug for The Sez sponsor who provided the family with the lovely Voyager)…Tennis is king in Serbia…your countryman just won the Australian Open…so in the spirit of good sportsmanship…your serve.

You Must be Nets…

On the Way to Grammy’s House….YES’ Beadle on the red carpet in Hollywood this weekend for People.com…sure she gets the same buzz walking L Frank down the IZOD hall for his pregame interview…Emmy Lou…And speaking of my good friends from Yankeeography…New York Sports Emmy nominations…Marv, Bird, Teardrop…and Nets basketball…Congratulations…Charlotte’s Web…Good to once again see the fan who sits next to me in Carolina in his hoop jersey-Jason Richardson…and tourquoise boots…which he bangs on the floor incessently…outstanding ambiance…Big Blue…Always a lift when one of the Giants in the house…Tight end Kevin Boss courtside for the Mavs…would have been nice if he gave the PA announcer one of those G-Men t-shirts…Boxing after Dark…The fellas taking it hard the last few games…RJ against the Lakers…VC vs. the Mavs…as well as Antoine…who looked like Ricky Hatton after his bout with Floyd Mayweather…All-Star Break…Looking for a tanning salon in Ithaca this weekend as we visit the older daughter…forecast for low 20’s and snow showers…beautiful…Pardon the Interruption…And on that note…I informed the lady formerly known as The Diva that the Big Red hoopsters were atop the Ivy…undefeated…trying to be the first team besides Penn or Princeton to win the title in 20 years…and the excited response…”I’m not really interested”…I am Gilligan.

Posted by Gary Sussman on February 11, 2008 at 11:55 a.m., ET

China Syndrome

The core is melting. And in sports, it's bound to happen. Jason Collins (The Sez always called him by his given name, rather than his gym name) on his way to visit Cal and see if the Memphis Tigers can claim their first NCAA title...the college and pro teams on Beale Street share the same home court...and we've all read the comments by my Captain...another member of the core...and then there is RJ...who sees his name everywhere but the All-Star roster...the three remaining members of the most glorious space ride in Nets history (with all due respect to our ABA forefathers)...the two trips to the NBA Finals and the six consecutive dippings into the post season per diem (my kids thank you very, very much)...those who get paid to write for a living have told you all the stats of Number 35...both the pro and con...and have examined the statements of his teammates (I would have liked to see a Kenyon or Kerry retrospective, but that's just me)...so there's no need for the Blogger to venture into Fifth Estate territory...I will just give you a couple of snapshots of one of the nicest, classiest and regular guys that I've had the pleasure of dealing with over the past 12 years.

The first thing you have to realize about the President of the Class (my nickname ...came in with Richard...big contract-treasurer...Veal...left school early... and Brandon...flunked out)...is that even when he tried to be difficult, he had no idea how to pull it off...so he was always a great go-to guy for both PR and the minions from community....especially when one 10-year old wrote that she had just interviewed a 'giant'....and when he turned serious, you listened intently...like the time he approached yours truly after a practice about something I had written in this space...which I thought was a harmless comment about a shooting contest incident from the previous practice...but JC was not so hospitable...voice inflection was all that was necessary...the message-what was acceptable for comment within the family should not be confused with exposure outside the family...and which also demonstrated to me that all the boos and barbs that had come his way over the past few years did indeed take its toll.

And so we bid a fond farewell and good luck to JC...who for Nets fans (and most of us are)...was a valued and vital member of the most glorious run the franchise has ever seen. Don't take a discount on that NBA store item... because the Cardinal is, and always will be, a top shelf guy.

You Must be Nets....

Steffi Graf(t)....Tale of two LG's...the one in the locker room gives me grief...the one at the top of the page hovering above the cartoon gives me a Voyager...how sweet is that!!!...and I was so clueless, I couldn't find the phone in the box...outstanding...and due to the over the top gesture, you'll be hearing more about this little present in the months to come....Miami Nice...Classic on-the-road mistake...called home while baking...as an ice storm pelted the home front...at least I left enough salt for the driveway...Karate Kid... Wild pre-game entertainment in Atlanta...was waiting for Mr. Miyagi to make an appearance...Santana...In honor of the Mets signing, the Yankees have asked Carlos to perform on Opening Day...CSI Miami...You know things are tough in the land of the Heat when even Rony Seikaly isn't courtside...Oprah 'Book of the Month'...Now reading 'Covert', story of NBA ref Bob Delaney living undercover to expose the Mob...a little different than deciding between a block or a charge...early results-two striped shirts up...Sean-sational...Congrats to the BC rook for making the Frosh/Soph All-Star comp...as LD would say...Pre-t-t-y good....Bartlett's Quotations...In a final tribute to the Jersey Twin from Stanford...pregame in the Atlanta lockerroom... one teammate asks, "Do his points count for us?"...would've made Lucious proud.

Posted by Gary Sussman on February 4, 2008 at 5:00 p.m., ET

Road Kill

0-6

Here's my take...Yankee extra inning game...Jeter goes for the golden sombrero (4 K's for the uninitiated)...the Pinstripes fall... the world is caving in...and then he goes out the next day with a sweet 3-4, 2 ribbies and some nifty fielding...deal...or no deal?....that's all I got, so let's move on to the essence of the last nine days, as I present the Expedia version of...

You Must be Nets....

I Love LA....Randy Newman needed to take our seven hour flight....with the obligatory stopover in Oklahoma City to refuel...usually it's Nebraska, but they must have thought we needed a change of venue to stop and stretch...if you think about it...we could have been in London with the time it took us to fly cross-country....Upset Special...Take an early evening walk to one of the favorite eating spots on the road...Edies Diner on the marina, a scant 7 minute walk from the hotel (historical note-this is the famous walk where, several years ago, the Bird Man spotted Norman Fell (Mr. Roper) walking towards us while he was still 50 yards up the road ...and as he approached, the actor said to The Bird and The Sez..."Hello, boys"...priceless)...egg white mushroom omelette dancing in my head...and as I approach the hallowed ground...darkness...Edies- out of business....land too valuable, condos instead of pancakes.... bad karma to start the trip....Valley of the Dolls...Great rays....both days....lots of orange in the arena...you could easily live there in the winter...and I have never experienced the thrill of victory in Phoenix in my decade-plus tenure in the league...and it was not going to change on the second chicken leg of the trip...so let's move on to...The Terminator....As nice as Phoenix was...how does cloudy, raw and rainy perk you up... stay at a hotel across the street from the state house...I always keep an eye out for Arnold...or even Maria...but the closest I came was an Arnold bobblehead in the gift shop...Mark Jackson was the only celebrity courtside...and he was doing the game....which didn't go too well...as we bus to the... Streets of San Francisco....If you've never been here...hire our bus driver, Vincent...his bus -think Great Adventure, without the bars on the seats to hold you in.... Food Channel...Kudos to the staff at the Oracle, for the upgrade in the press room food....when you travel, you rank the press rooms like You-The-Schuh-Mann gives the power rankings on NBA.com...some rise, some fall, some stay the same...Golden State-rises a few spots in the rankings....and if you had sampled before, a sorely needed jump...Mile High...Felt good, as I finished "Clapton", the autogiography...very enlightening, with one exception...the book was far more interesting when he was stoned and drunk all the time....once he sobered up and got his life together, ..he was just like any other world-touring, mulit-millionaire father of four who loves to spend the holidays with his kids...even if those holidays were in Antigua, or Paris, or London or LA... at least it was entertaining for the first 275 pages....Orange County Chopper... John the bus driver looked like Paul, Sr., complete with Fu stash...Billie Jean...Went into the press room looking for the Aussie Open womens final...hoops on three tv's...and a pig auction from the Denver stock show on the fourth.... Soo-ee...or Sharapova?....Your serve....Fran Tarkenton....Movie theatre connected to the hotel...always a plus when you don't have to go outside in Minny (even though temps were acceptable)...saw 'Michael Clayton'....Now, I'm not Gene Shalit, or Jeffrey Lyons or even Yogi on YES...but in my humble opinion, and that of my wingmate, Leroy the Security Guy...this was a very good film...I give it two crossover dribbles up...Captain Kangaroo...Bus driver look-a-like...Pain Relief...Needed some medication after watching the time-out entertainment-did a 'Rock-Paper-Scissors' compeition...thought it was a joke, until the lady ran off the court like she had won the Super Bowl...worse I had felt since sitting through 'Napolean Dynamite'...Condolences...To longtime Nets broadcaster Jim Spanarkel, on the loss of his dad, Ray.

Posted by Gary Sussman on January 28, 2008 at 11:31 a.m., ET

Streaking

So it has been some time since we have conversed, and as I sit here in lovely downtown Sacratomatoes...stop number three on the Jersey Tour Across America...in my palatial suite on the 13th floor (and right there you have the essence of the home of of Arnold and the Kings-for all of the haters, that would be the Governor of California, The Terminator, since Sac is the state capitol...I'm sure you knew that already...but I digress)...I received an email from a loyal subject...the Night Stalker...who wanted, who needed to hear some words of solace during these difficult times...and he questioned why was I not performing my assigned duty to lift the spirit of The Flock during times of need...and five in a row on the down side would qualify...certainly not as much as the Heat, who need Hawkeye and the fellas from M*A*S*H to perform an intervention...but certainly a period in the season that could be a bit better. And as I watched Serena walk through her quarterfinal loss in the Australian Open...and Johnny Flynn miss his last eight from the floor for the Orange...with a little Democratic debate from Gamecock country...dining on some delicious chicken wraps that I also ate for lunch...I figured it was time to reach within...to dig deep...to persevere despite the record...to give you my new favorite drink...which was developed in the Nutmeg State...but has been blended perfectly in the Garden State.

He had flashes last year...in fact, had some truly superb games. And struggled early in his second season. But if you are a Nets fan (and aren't most of us)...you have to be enjoying the play of the taller of the two Connecticut Huskies. No stats here....that is for those who get paid to write for a living...just impressions on the play of Josh (Don't call me Daniel) Boone...who has been cementing his place in the rotation over the past month...bounding, dunking, blocking and running...quick to the glass...effective on the pick and roll...contesting shots and starting and finishing the fast breaks. Last year, during a press session, JB was asked about comments made by his college Hall of Fame coach....that the only obstacle to how good Josh can be is Josh himself...and JB just laughed...maybe he knew something that JC (Jim Calhoun -for the haters) didn't know...because at this point, in his second NBA campaign...when The Little General is looking for a tall drink...it will not be one of the famous concoctions of Dr. Rich Dalatri...it will be a very simple...JB...and water...on the glass.

You Must be Nets....

Nenad...The man they call Curly is making very good progress...accompanied the team on the West Coast swing... I forgot how soothing it was to hear that Serbian chatter on the bus...and he's very proud of the tennis exploits of his countrymen and women....for such a small country, they have amazing talent....I Love LA....Not to say that the Clipper crowd is a little different than the Laker bunch...but the biggest celeb in the house last week was Lucious Harris and his three kids...Sins of the Father...To show how I have matured over the years...I made sure that on Sunday while in Phoenix...and knowing it was single digits back home...not to call the family while I was sitting at the pool...and you were wondering where my daughter got those Ivy League smarts....Oprah Book of the Month Club...Reading 'Clapton'...autobiography of the music legend...truly amazing that he was still alive to write the book...a degree in musicology is not required... Sez gives it two 'Layla's' up....and unlike 'Pistol', I actually paid for the book...Game-Tyne(s)....The Big Blue providing some needed timeout respite on Sunday...monitors at courtside all tuned to FOX...couldn't help but sneak a peak...the quality of play was astounding given the weather conditions ...they"ll be able to thaw out very nicely in the Valley of the Sun... left some suntan lotion for Eli in room 504... Beadle Juice...YES's reporter making the West Coast jaunt...also did her People.com duties while in LA... interviewed George Clooney and The Little General in the same day... doesn't get better than that...Condolences...To our dear friend Ian Eagle, on the loss of his father, Jack...a renowned comedian and TV commercial legend...Ian's eulogy was an incredible display of humor and sadness, of wit and wisdom, of heartfelt thoughts and emotions...for those in attendance, it will never be forgotten...You had to think that Jack, the once and always Catskill comic, was smiling at his son's virtuoso performance....May he rest in peace.

Posted by Gary Sussman on January 22, 2008 at 10:47 a.m., ET

5

So with the writers strike still on ongoing issue, The Sez was debating whether to cross the picket line so he could join The Flock in the climb up the .500 mountain...as the fellas pulled into the plus column with another road win, this time in HotLanta...and as he always does, my Captain provided the spark, the impetus, the will for The Blogger to forge forward...not with the back-to-back, belly-to-belly triple doubles...no, that's what we expect (and I must say this again, because I really don't know how many are watching or listening...but if you are a Nets fan (and some of us are)....you really should play very close attention to what you're witnessing... Lebron may have the building poster on the shores of Lake Erie...but we have a closer-to-35-than -34 year old running around the court like he just came out of the dorm at Cal...do you realize how difficult it is to do what he's doing?....just watch closely...and marvel...but I digress)...no, my Captain has given me something much more valuable...he has given me material...with a capital M....as in mustache.

I received an email from the warped minds of those in charge of the AMI...that would be the American Mustache Institute...who wanted to interview my Captain, with the intent to provide whatever support they could in helping him promote the mustache...a little Monty Python-ish...but a real website, and the email was actually moving along quite nicely...until cute got in the way of humor (and in the spirit of full Rocket disclosure...where they turned me off is when they took a shot (not in the butt) at VC...in their attempt at humor, they annoyed me...first impression, and you're going to use the Tar Heel as a punchline?...so we sliced and diced them)...but the reality remains that the mustache has taken on a life of its own...I believe the last time #5 got bored with his look was when he went blonde in Phoenix...and I know what some of you (well maybe none of you) may be asking yourself...Sez...you had a mustache...would Lou have let J Kidd go forward with the lip hair?

Well, my main man Double L would have had no problem with Selleck, Gossage, Guidry or Kidd...but The Sez...as we would say...different pay scale...players-yes...staff-you can keep it, but you can then watch all the games on TV...so as we salute #5 and the 5-game win streak...and in honor of The Captain's Bay Area roots...I say we go Oakland A's....Bando, Fingers, Rudi,Catfish...VC, RJ, Boone, Sean...I'm sure we can get it sponsored.

You Must be Nets....

Dr. Welby....I'm not going to use this cartoon-oriented forum to debate the pros and cons of The Rockets' defense...but there is one item from his press conference I need to address...when asked why he didn't have a medical doctor inject him, he said he thought his workout guy, his strength and conditioning guy, was a licensed doctor...so in support of the Yankee pinstripes...when I need a shot for my back...forget the team docs...I'm going straight to our Assistant Coach for Strength and Conditioning...the coach the Little General refers to as (Dr.) Rich Dalatri....Numbers...Herb the Official Scorer records game number 1000 in a row this Friday night when the fellas host Boston...Herb though he had hit the mark in November, but then realized he had counted the missed games from the lockout season...when asked about the scoring miscue, the man whose job involves counting replied, "Correctable error"...just a little basketball humor on a warm January day...Cracker Jacks...Sitting next to a very nice fellow and his family in HotLanta...ref hits the bench with a tech...the nice fellow says 'didn't hear it, but you know how those guys in the Northeast talk'...at which point I asked him if there was indoor plumbing in the arena....Inside the NFL....Heard at courtside, after VC was called for a block on Marvin Williams..." I didn't know Earl Campbell was playing tonight'... thought you'd like that....Eli's Coming...If it was good for Three Dog Night...it's good for the third time against the 'Boys...Lost ....Floor manager working the YES telecast Saturday night, sitting on the other side of The Blogger, taps me on the arm and points to my Captain.."That fellow really likes to play'...whew...I didn't realize that!...War of the Worlds...Route 17 at Essex Street...Thought I saw Tom Cruise in one of the backhoes...Carolina Blue...On the bus ride to the hotel, spotted a 'Coin and Gun Store'....what do they do, have skeet shooting while you wait for your laundry?...Au Revoir....The Ivy-daughter (the actress formerly known as The Diva) is heading back to the banks of the Cayuga after semester break...I don't want to say that she relaxed, but her most ambitious activity was to take her sister....tanning....sweet!!

Posted by Gary Sussman on January 7, 2008 at 9:10 p.m., ET

The Young and the Restless

It's been a few days since we last visited...as I tried to spread a little Holiday cheer with the annual Chistmas tome (now, I know I am not Edgar Allen Poe, but is there any need for some of the vitriol directed at The Sez by those who say they cannot follow along...let's see...for all Nets fans(and in this particular case, most, but not all of us are)...all of the particpants either had a number on their back...or could be found in the Nets Bible...The Aaron Harris/Matt Tumbleson Media Guide...required reading for any Netsaholic...and I know that it must be a Jeopardy question to identify who is Twin or The Big Cat...so for next December...for all the haters...$25 worth of Barclays travelers checks...but I digress)...back to the topic...I apologize for the riff...the fellas have put together a four of five run...the lone loss to the Pistons..a very good team...and finishing with a flourish on the road in the home of Laverne and Shirley (more on that later)...the games have been well chronicled by those who get paid to write for a living...but for our purposes...we will focus on the (Big) Threes Company...which does not include Suzanne Somers...because she can't run like SW and Ka-Boone.

First of all...kudos to Double D of the Ledger for the nickname of the year...too good to be true...we speak of Le Freak Elastique...if I didn't have to see him everyday, I certainly would have copped it for my own...but the BC frosh is all of that..and then some. Who knew?...Now, we are not touting him for ROY (that would be Rookie of the Year for the haters...but I digress)...but his athleticism around the basket is very un-Net-like...ever the revered Number 6, now a Nuggett, did not block and alter as Fly Like an Eagle has done on a regular basis...and combine that with the quickness to the hoop of the Young Huskie (Boone..again for those who can't follow)...and the pace has certainly quickened for the residents of IZOD...which is a joy to behold...because we always marvel at J Kidd running and passing, lobbing and probing, the alley-oop and the bursts to the hoop...the only one we haven't see yet...and you know it's coming...is the pass off the glass to the trailin'...and soarin'...and jammin'...Le Freak Elastique...I know, I used it without notation...but I couldn't help myself. We anxiously await...2008.

You Must be Nets....

Tradin'Man....Travelin' Man goes to Philly...becomes the Ramblin' Man...and then barely a month in...morphs into the Tradin' Man...the Stefanski imprint taking shape with the Sixers...was told he asked Utah to include 10 cheeseteaks with the Giracek deal....Milwaukee's Finest...Now, let me preface this by saying that the residents are lovely people...but every time we travel to the home of the (Uncle) Bucks, I expect to see Michael J. Fox skateboarding down the street...Alumni Week...And speakijg of Milwaukee...and the annual return of Fast Eddie Jordan and Mike O'Koren to their Jersey roots...one of the highlights of The Sez's NBA tenure was the two days playing spades with Mikey and former Nets radio man Bob Papa in Milwaukee in the late 90's...all you need to know was that Papa was not enthralled with The Bloggers expertise...think Joe Pesci in 'Good Fellas'...Happy Days...Pulled off all of my holiday shopping without once stepping into a store...except if you count the post office to send back many of my expert selections...J Kidd...As we close out 2007, let me reiterate once again...you will never see another one like him...Mariano...In case you have'nt noticed...VC is getting his late-game heroics in gear...many can play...not all can close...Happy New Year to all...

Posted by Gary Sussman on December 30, 2007 at 10:00 p.m., ET

A Holiday Story

Twas the Night before Santa
And all through the gym
No cackling, no banter
Or errant shots at the rim

The balls in their racks
Gary B serious,no joker
Needed to get back
To fleece more suckers in poker

Trainers room still
Tim Walsh left early
Stockings to fill
No treatments for Curly

Trainer Reicher said good-bye
Had locked every door
While Pete the video guy
Asleep on the floor

But then, a flicker of light
Corner door ajar
A small figure in sight
Munching a giant Hershey bar

The Little General sat alone
A moan...then a sigh
Should he bring Chinese food home
Like everyone else in the Tribe?

And then...a look outside
Pitch faint...then higher
Was it 'Pimp my Ride'?
Or Josh Boone's tires?

And then they came
Slowly...one by one
They knew no game
You mean...just for fun?

Come Boone, Come Marcus
Huskie pair dressed in black
Greeting Malik and Sean W.
A high five for The Big Cat

The Euros on time
Afraid of being early
No Bobby Marks fine
For either Boki or Curly

DA dressed for the date
His smile a bright light
Then came a running mate
American Gangster...An-Toine Wright

Luxury rides now streamin'
Windows very dim
Beyonce'?.. the group dreamin'
No...just Twin

VC ... rims spinning
Made his way to the lot
RJ was grinning
Because his date was so hot

And that left just one
To join the team fray
They wouldn't miss the fun
Here came J Kidd... and TJ

And then..a strange car
No lights...can't see
The rook whispered
It's my man...Ed Ste-fan-ski

He had driven north
Sipping nog...his elixer
The Bald Eagle had come forth
To steal a player for his Sixers

The Pres had told him
He'll be under the tree
Ski was bursting from within
#5... is that who'd he see?

Ski was sure to tip
Not to make a sound
But he spotted a chocolate chip
Does not mind a little round

The Wharton smile burned
Had given Rod a fake... then a deke
But his mentor had learned
From Zeke from Cabin Creek

Philly was hot
Fans could care less
But this was his shot
To solve the lottery mess

One player is all
Success was in sight
Dreams of playoff ball
In the still of the night

And has he approached the tree
His eyes growing larger
Who did he see...
But number 54...Rodney Rodgers

So the fellas felt fine
An alum from past title might
As they lifted their wine
And wished a Merry Chrstmas to all...and to all...a good night.

Posted by Gary Sussman on December 16, 2007 at 11:31 a.m., ET

Ode to the Travelin' Man.....

It finally became reality. I walked into the training room after battling the Ming Dynasty (where Timmy the Trainer, the Master of Massage, was taping the tender ankle of VC, which has improved dramatically under the direction of the maestro...picture D. Wayne Lucas attending to the precious legs of Derby winners Winning Colors, or Thunder Gulch...because The Sez has always likened great hoopsters like Vince to the grace and elegance of the great thoroughbreds... where you sit enthralled by their speed and gait...but where one misstep can cause unspoken consequences for both the athlete and those connected...those legs must be cared for with the utmost of care...but I digress)...and as the NBA highlights were on display, a shot from the Philly game showed a very familiar face...in his new perch, looking out over his new team...and it then hit home for The Cartoon....he was not coming back...the Bald Eagle had landed.

The call came late at night...in Cleveland...where you want to go to bed early, just to hasten your departure the next day...but it was not unusual to hear from my GM at any hour...my real wife had already dubbed him my second wife...with one big difference....he always paid...but the conversation was not what I expected...the Philly cheesesteak was staying home...no more commute....no more haircuts in Rutherford....no more lunches throughtout Bergen County and destinations across America...I was now talking to the new Chief Wahoo of the Sixers...and this could not have been a more perfect scenario for Ski...from Philly...went to school in Philly...played college ball at Penn...was a successful businessman in Philly....and had never moved from Philly...even if you excuse the apartment he finally leased this year to ease the travails of the Turnpike. And that was it...just like that...Philly's gain had been the Nets loss...an immediate pall settled over the basketball department...when interviewed, The Little General said it best when asked about the former mortgage maven..."I don't want this to sound like a eulogy"....but The Travelin' Man did have that effect on those who dealt with him on a daily basis...which was now in its ninth...and as it turns out...its final edition. But let us not wallow in self-pity...but celebrate The Polish Prince's ascension to the top of his hometown hoop hierarchy....and the press conference to announce his coronation....where he thanked everyone from elementary school principal to the local bagel guy....for a moment, I thought he wasn't accepting the presidency of the Sixers...but had agreed to become the Republican nominee for President!...I had heard of Clapton Unplugged...but now we were getting Ski Unplugged....and so as a service to his new employees in the City of Brotherly Love...please lose The Travelin' Man....from now on...you may refer to your leader, Ed Stefanski, as... The Ramblin' Man.

You Must be Nets....

Let's Schmooze....Somers giving the PA guy much love the other night...even calling me by the name my parents put on the birth certificate...and then takes a shot at The Blogger, all in a span of 20 seconds...two hits for the price of one... a Red Bull ego boost...as a token of my appreciation, I've ordered him a Larry David autographed yamulke....Why is This Night Different From all Other Nights....Our own Double C, Chris Carrino, featured in the '5 Questions' section in the Post...question six...where was The Capper?....Getting Ethnic...(another tribute to The Schmoozer)....Our own Bird Man starting to plan the Bar Mitzvah of his son Noah, the budding Spitz (Mark, not Eric, for all of you WFAN fans)....Ian is a true company man...has asked if Izod makes prayer shawls....Sopranos on A&E....The brown caddy continues to idle outside The Bing....Christmas trees are being sold in the adjacent lot...someone should put a wreath ornament on the hood....Friday Night Lights...Memo to the producers: I watch this show with my teenage daughter,The Younger One..can we please tone done the high school sexcapades...thank you....Winter Meetings....Maybe the Yanks can get Carlos Santana....Play of the Day...Our own Natalie Grant, the President's executive assistant, has announced her retirement...will not be changing leagues, just diapers...her place in Nets lore firmly entrenched...tickets were left for Mr. Steinbrenner at the Winners Club...Nat asked The Boss for ID....n-i-c-e!!!

Posted by Gary Sussman on December 8, 2007 at 7:46 p.m., ET

Travelocity.com

As the keeper of the faith, the one chosen to illuminate half full rather than half empty (as the Tribe celebrates the Festival of Lights, but more on that later) and the self-annointed Dr. Phil-it-up for the Flock, The Sez does not have much to add to the prose that has been emanating from Nets Daily on the current state of the fellas...you watch, you see, you ponder, you reflect...I cannot (and will not...always think of that one word that hovers over the home base whenever the fingers start wandering on the keyboard...tuition... but I digress)....so in what has become habit of The Cartoon during this muddled start...time for a little diversion...a little break from the daily commute down 17...our tribute to the Holiday travel season...except I wouldn"t call trips to Detroit and Cleveland garden spots...but that being said, they do provide material.

Let's begin on Saturday night, as the fellas fought back from the brink of extinction to overcome the Sixers in OT...and I only bring that up because the Sez had been told of 'weather' issues staring us in the face, and I was not looking to a dismal opening travel leg off a seven spot on the negative side at the Swamp. So the mood was fine...and so was the flight...until the descent into Motown...which you must know is not where we wanted to go...Pontiac is the site of choice, but Metro Airport in Detroit had longer runways...yup, that's really what you want to hear...as if we're jetting into Cambodia. And you would have thought we were landing in the rain forest judging by what was taking place outside the window ( The Sez took on the role of William Shatner in the famous Twilight Zone episode...I really did believe there was someone on the wing...but I digress)...but, the pilot, in the words of Frank Lucas, "my man", got us down safely...and primed for a 45 minute bus ride...where I'm glad we had eight-wheel drive...bedtime...about 4 a.m....with one problem...the red light on the phone refuses to go off...sleep depravation and interrogation all for one price.

The day in Detroit is right out of the Chamber of Commerce...raining, grey, visibility set for a chipmunk...Gorgeous hotel...red light, you know about that...blow dryer doesn't shut off...so sparks fly when you pull the plug out of the wall...you can get a hernia from taking all the pillows off the bed...as if the former Shah of Iran was an expected guest...and the tub is so deep, you have to hurdle to take a shower...but who can complain about 5-star...the breakfast meeting was outstanding...so all is good..until the game...but we don't deal with that here.

The local channels in the former home of Barry Sanders talk of high winds as we set off for Cleveland...how high?...the bus taking us to the airport was swaying...and I'm told it's only a three hour bus ride...any takers?...you learn early when not to raise your hand...as we sit on the runway for several minutes...for the 20-minute air trek...which was fine for the first 15...but that last five...let me describe it this way...I asked the flight attendant if they had a bar to put across my seat to hold me in...like I was at Great Adventure...we did more bobbin' and weavin' than Sugar Ray Leonard in the corner against Marvin Hagler...I know that we're flying into the home of the Rock N' Roll Hall of Fame, but did that mean we had to simulate upon entry?...but I always feel better when I get on the bus, and Coach Sully, the lifetime winner of the Mike O'Koren Tarheel Flying Award, says to The Sez, grinning broadly, "How about that flight?" Misery loves company.

You Must be Nets....

Bellman of the Year...Gary at The Townsend...seems as if he's always on duty, whether at 3.a.m. or 1 PM...wears a big fur hat to stay warm...and never takes it off, even when delivering a packet to the room...outstanding...The Young Stefanski...Kevin, Childress's main guy in Minny...gloating over the offensive explosion on Sunday...has offered to deliver Peterson his meals and get his dry cleaning...Bonus Round...One of the problems with Detroit is you have to watch the Lions...but Peterson was on display....and that was a treat...he may be a cross between OJ and Sayers...or he just may be Peterson...kind of like Newman...one of a kind....Cookie Monster...Detroit press room...four different types of cookies...now that, ladies and gentleman, is media friendly....The Chosen People....Went to a very popular discount chain looking for an electric menorah...asked the customer service rep if she knew where they were located in the store...turns to her co-worker and asks..."Do we have any electric mowers?"....I drove away quickly....Happy Birthday...To my oldest daughter, Marli, who turns 20 on Friday...she has outgrown the nickname...Condolences...To Steph, on the loss of his dad.

Posted by Gary Sussman on December 3, 2007 at 5:25 p.m., ET

(Don't) Curb Your Enthusiasm

From the mountains of Salt Lake, to the Nike swoosh of Portland, to Pikes Market in Seattle and finally the glamour that is LA...I hope that Disney on Ice was as successful as the fellas on this most recent November trek...with the downs (Utah stampede) and the ups (three straight, reach the Indy 500 mark in spectacular fashion) well chronicled...so The Sez will not bore with the effeciency or deficiency of the pick and roll, the screen and roll or the turkey day butter on a hard roll...no, we'll give The Flock what they expect from The Cartoon...our Inside Edition, Extra, Extra, People Magazine look at the Week That Was.

Best part of the flight to Utah...we didn't have to re-fuel in Nebraska...have you ever been to Nebraska...but this little pit stop usually adds a nice chunk on time to the trip...so instead of Salt Lake, you could have been in Maui...but we got there in fine shape, and considering what took place, should have passed this stop, collected $200 and proceeded to the next destination on our Monopoly game...but then I would not have had the pleasure of listening to the very creative fan keep yelling at the Little General..."Hey Larry, why don't you sit down"...I guess he was affected by the writers strike.

To the Great Northwest...where if it doesn't rain, you feel like you hit Lotto...the annual trip to the Nike employee store...can you say early Christmas....followed by a sumptous meal with A Harris, the Prince of PR, the Ledger's Double D (if you read this and don't know that is Dave, hand in your Nets Visa card) and Freddie from the Post...the waiter was a former sportsriter from Tampa...I'm sure he makes more working in this establishment...let's just say that the meal was one of the top three in our entertaining the scribes when they travel cross country...The Prince is still licking his lips over the dessert...and we stop the bleeding at the Rose Garden.

Seattle...an underrated city...which will look like Shangri La compared to Oklahoma City...which takes nothing away from Oklahoma, but the fans were pleading for someone to hear their 'Save our Sonics' chants during the game...let's backtrack to Thanksgiving...and a Sez rule of thumb...you can never go wrong when you dine in a 5-star hotel on the arm...Thanksgiving was better than outstanding...let's just say the bird was so moist, I thought that it swam into the banquet room...followed by a little 'American Gangster"...the travel party including YES's Sparky, The Capper and Timmy the Trainer...and for those who critiqued that it was too long...the final scenes were Denzel and Crowe together...that's like Ali and Frazier...it's all good...and an excellent flick...which brings us to gametime...where the Sonic press room has the ambience of a stroll in the woods in early December...and that may be a disservice to the woods...but we got win duece (Durant is special)...and took a walk to the Farmers Market on Saturday just in case that's all she wrote next season...oh, did I mention no rain...what are the chances of five days in the land of the Unibomber and not a drop of rain...should have realized then that we were in the midst of some good karma.

Which brings us to Hollywood...and as I approach the scorers table for the pre-game radio gig, our own Chris Carrino, known to all as Double C, exclaims 'Suss, there's Larry David"..and a gaze to my left brings me oh so close to the People's Choice...Sean W. leaves the layup line to shake his hand...and he looks exactly like he does on Curb...which is not a surprise, since he plays himself...and an informal poll indicated that Jack may have been miffed when the Lake Show played the Curb theme during the game and showed LD on the video screen...and no shot of Jack... and I would be remiss if I did not give props to the cuisine in the Chick Hearn Press Room...as the PR Pince stated after his meal of salad, chicken, fish, meat loaf from the carving station and a sundae from the ice cream station..."best in the league"...and then the fellas went out and booked three in a row...which made the red eye into the pea soup of Newark (by the way, I have checked ny NBA rules manual, and there is no league mandate that says you cannot have a smooth flight..but I digress)...almost pleasant, if you can call pulling into the driveway at 9 a.m. joyous...but to pay homage to my main man,LD, two words can best describe the 3-1... Pret-t-y Good.

You Must be Nets...

Bourne Identity...Lobby in Portland...make conversation with a man walking two dogs...tells me to have nice broadcast...did not seem like a guy who would listen to the radio pre-game...Pardon the Interruption...Boki getting ready to do the post-game radio following the Laker win...takes off his headset to shake Larry David's hand ...The Sez froze in the presence of greatness...Everybody Loves Raymond...Brad Garrett, who played Raymond's bro, in the hotel lobby in LA...that's the best I got...not a strong showing this trip...Joy to the World...Many thanks to the family in the next room in LA...who got up at 4:30 Sunday morning to catch a flight...and let their young child become a human alarm clock by perfecting an incessant shrill that would have scared Lassie...next year I may take a room in one of the house boats.

Posted by Gary Sussman on November 26, 2007 at 5:38 p.m., ET

Cranberry Blog

The message boards were very relevant for a trip to the Great Northwest...where if the sun does shine, you feel that you've been transported to the Maui Classic (and by the way, for some, the Holiday season begins with the Macy's parade...for others, the hours and hours of football on Thanksgiving...for The Sez, nothing ushers in the Holiday cheer more than Raf in Hawaii...with or without the flowered shirt...but I digress)....back to the hoops, which had reached a six-spot....and The Flock as apoplectic...moaning and groaning, heaving and seething, ripping and snorting....and then, there were some who said...hold on...early in the season, injuries abound, give it some time...it's too early to drive off of Route 3....and then, The Captain spoke, the scribes wrote...and VC dressed. And for Nets fans (and aren't we all)...what a pleasant site. In red. Just like Santa.

Timmy the Trainer, the Master of the Massage, had worked diligently with the pride of Maitland High for the past week or so. Twice a day, every day. And every media session The LG (the head coach, not the logo at the top of the page), had answered the question...when?....and the answer...when he can....which would not be before T the T would be 101.5 FM percent sure that Vince could play without any hesitation...until No. 15 could look into the eyes of the former Upsala College catcher and say with conviction "I'm a go"....T the T played in three NCAA Division III Championship Tournaments....he knew when his pitchers did not have their best stuff, but wanted to stay in the game anyway...not this time, not this player, not this team...VC was only returning if he had his fastball, not a reasonable fascimile thereof....and when Half Man/All Amazin threw down the one-hand flush late in the game...you knew the catcher had called for the right pitch. Get Girardi on the phone.

You Must be Nets....

Basketball Jones...I know that it was a late game...and that the Turkey crush abounds...but the Blazers game was the best of the year..lots of scoring, lots of drama...and a needed win for the good guys...but make no mistake...the Portland young guns are good, they play hard...and they will have the Big Fella next season...enjoy the win while you can....Santa's Workshop....The hotel lobby in Seattle has more Christmas trees than FAO Schwartz....Stuff This!....Nothing says Thanksgiving more than looking out my hotel room into a sea of grey concrete...if I felt like Spiderman, I could jump into someone else's room....You're a long way from home, Dorothy...Going back a few days (we haven't talked in a while)...walking the streets of Salt Lake (which are wider than the runways at Newark)...young man approaches wearing a jersey...Malone?...Stockton?....J Kidd?...how about Brodeur....I always link Utah with hockey country.....A-Rod....He put up mammoth numbers...in rarified air when you examine the baseball stats...and that's not worthy of a unanimous MVP vote?...assistant coach Sully was mortified....Feedback....The Sez getting some nice words from visiting media after they peruse the musings of the blog...I may record the kindness and send it to the bashers (and you know who you are) as a Holiday stuffer.-Joy to the World...Page Six....Boki spotted at the UFC big event held last Saturday at The Rock in Newark...a little dated, but after his 23-point outburst at the Rose Garden, I felt the love....Inquiring Minds....Team made the annual trip to the Nike Store in Beaverton on Tuesday...VC shopping for sneaks...so the question..."If you have your own sneaker, do you buy yours or someone else's?"...text me if you want the answer....Perspective....Learned in the paper that the wife of our own Double C, Chris Carrino, sends chocolate turkeys to his hotel room in on this Thursday...my family asked me if I was in LA yet.....Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!!!

Posted by Gary Sussman on November 22, 2007 at 2:14 p.m., ET

Elastic Man

The message boards, blogs and varied social commentary are alive with the sounds of music...or in this case, the sounds of Sean...as the masses impart their advice to the Little General about all things rotation...with the passion emoted a pleasure to see in print...I trust all of you do the same in person...and if you have listened very closely to the words of the Nets Head Coach, you would understand that this is a process...and the youngest of my many bosses has been very honest with the media...he has said the rookie (who was spared from having to personally go to Popeyes after practice for the Boston road trip...but the food was secured...that's all you need to know...but I digress)...has played well....that his first two battles were when the game was out of reach...that he needed to see how he would fare when the action was a bit more intense...and that he has earned more time...and since he was the first big off the bench against Byron's Bugs...you would assume the process is evolving. But the true measure of sucess is not the playing time...in the world of The Sez...it's The Nickname.

You can take the blocks and the dunks, the leaping and the swatting, the contesting and the altering...which has never been a mainstay at The Swamp (The Travelin' Man had likened Sean to the beloved Number 6...in athletic terms...K Mart could guard all five positions...and it seems SW can swat shots from all five)...but even this small sample called for a moniker...and it comes to us by way of The Bird Man and The Teardrop from the Monday night telecast (and once again, kudos to Flip and the powers at YES for bringing back the Nets Encore...so that those of us who are at the games can now enjoy the broadcast excellence of the A and A1 steaksauce teams)...as Ian labels the rookie...The Elastic Man...and The King of Queens co-signs. Forget playing time. The priorities are now in order.

You Must be Nets....

Nancy Sinatra....The PR guy was asked how severe was Vince's injury...the reply..."If you see the boot, it's serious"...and unfortunately, for the second time this young season, Timmy the Trainer said these boots were made for walking...not good for driving or high-flying....Weekend Update....And on the subject of boots, Vince has shed his...and Marcus did the same last week...working out diligently...trying to get back his Body by Jake look from the off-season....Alfred Hitchcock....Walking to the Center on Monday, I was inundated by a cacophony of hoots emanating from a large tree...one glance and you're thinking 'The Birds'...but after two 4-point plays in the same quarter...lets go with 'The Omen'....Can You Dig It?...Whatever happened to The Big Dig...there was comfort in year after year to see the dirt, and equipment, and workers and overall mess that made Boston look like the country's biggest urban sandbox...and what do we have now...plazas, grass, illuminated stanchions...soon you'll tell me the Celtics got both Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett in the off-season...Mr.(not Mrs.) Fields...Sez took some hits for too much food talk in the last edition...so we have slimmed it down to this...a tip of the chocolate chip to A.Harris, the Prince of PR, for his addition of the cookie platter to the press room cuisine...even the boys from SLAM can appreciate the effort...Jersey Boys...John Lloyd Young, who plays Frankie Valli when the lights are on, sang the anthem Monday night...the PA Guy almost asked him for tickets...WWE...And on the subject of the PA Guy...joining his alter ego, The Cartoon, in getting body slammed by readers in North Jersey...I will send personalized ring tones for the Holidays....Who Knew...The Diva, obviously with time on her hands, particpates in an eye study on the grounds of the Big Red-Ink...earns $7.50...and finds out she has 20/15 vision...all along, I thought I was grooming the next Sandra Day O'Connor...and I find out I'm living with Wade Boggs.

Posted by Gary Sussman on November 14, 2007 at 10:12 a.m., ET

City of (Grandfatherly) Love

The Captain (whose Cape was a bit tattered, having taken a knee to the thigh from Deng..and all you needed to see was his reaction at the time...similar to when Ali saw blood...could this be happening to me?...but I digress) had said it all-'butt-whippin'...so it was on to Philly for the first road game of the young campaign, and as all of the scribes have written...it was a quiet bus ride down the Turnpike...but where there is travel, there is food...so I would like to report that the chicken caesar wraps were outstanding, and for dessert, chocolate chip cookie chips provided by Nets long-time game stats operator Mike (Sesame Seed) Butti, who actually owns a bagel store in Ridgewood (we'll give him many free plugs over the course of the season...but I digress)...and after a fine nap, arrival...where there were several sad souls waiting for autographs...(we will chronicle the most creative of these creatures as the season evolves)..and upon entry to the fine accomodations...see that the Lakers are pounding the Suns by 30...in Phoenix...feeling better already.

When The Cape is not flowing freely...it's time for Timmy the Trainer...and the Maestro of Massage did his thing as only he can...first on Wednesday, to get J Kidd back in the game...and then on Friday...and now again on Saturday...and Nets fans (and aren't we all) were waiting to see how the fellas would bounce back...only Game 3...too early for a must win...but certainly a contest that would look into the soul of the squad. The men and women who get paid to tell you what happended on the court have well-chronicled the activities that led to the five-point Nets win. What The Blogger gives you is the action off the court...call it The Blogger vs. The Codger.

It was about midway through the first quarter..The PR guy ( I always use my formal title during a game)...sitting at the scorers table next to the TV statistician (whose workplace resembled a pre-school class, complete with hundreds of small sheets of paper, markers, pens, etc)..all so he can provide Marvelouso with the pertinent facts...Marv and The Teardop sitting next to the stats guy, doing what they do. Out of nowhere, an elderly man, we peg him at 80+, now known as The Codger...jumps out of his seat and rushes the table, yelling to the stats guy ..."Tell him to turn around, tell him to turn around"...and pokes at Marv (who never even flinches)...He was annoyed that Marv had stood up to see around the LG...The Codger then lets loose with a string of expletives more fit for 'The Sopranos' than 'The Jeffersons'...screaming that he pays good money for his seats, and that if Marv doesn't sit down, he's going to sue...this is so absurd you know I can't be making it up... The PR guy finds the nearest usher to tell him to get this nut job away from us...as The Codger (dressed in a back jacket and black jeans, complete with silver hair-not all his own- and hearing aid)...continues his filthy verbal assault...oh, by the way, he has a young boy next to him, which you can assume was his grandson...if not, look for his picture on the next installment of 'To Catch a Predator'...but the PR guy...in an unusual display of restraint, does not acknowledge his existence...and as I settle back into my seat, The Codger utters the words that will always remind me of Philly..."Don't mess with me,