August 4, 2004

I start out this week's column with an apology to Jason Kidd. Jason, I am extremely sorry for the hearty laughter and plethora of jokes I have gotten out of the Nets' offseason moves. I don't know what is more devastating, the fact that New Jersey lost K-Mart and Kittles OR the fact that they now have Jacque Vaughn. Does no one watch this guy play? HOW does he keep ending up on teams? If I was Kidd I would want out too! That is the reason for my apology. J-Kidd did the right thing, he didn't bolt to greener pastures last summer when San Antonio came calling, he stayed put. Then the team was sold and will eventually be moved to Brooklyn. Byron Scott was fired, Martin and Kittles have been traded and the answer is 2002 first round draft pick Nenad Krstic and Jacque Vaughn? Never mind....that IS funny. Apology withdrawn......

I'm glad to see Allen Iverson and Larry Brown picked up right where they left off. Clearly Iverson was right all along by not listening to Brown in Philly. What good can possibly come out of practicing and meeting? OH.......that's right....an NBA CHAMPIONSHIP and a GOLD MEDAL!! I am concerned for the ol' U.S. of A. not because they lost to Italy (Giacomo Galanda is a great player.........I guess) no my fear is much greater. You see, Daniel Santiago who plays for Puerto Rico, had more points against the U.S. Olympic team (9) than he did against me (7) in a recent pickup game at the RDV Sportsplex Athletic Club. Now you understand my concern.

I was in the mall the other day looking for a Steven Hunter bobblehead doll when I realized two things...1) I was more likely to stumble across the remains of Jimmy Hoffa, and 2) what a scary toy that is, eyebrows raised, always smiling and nodding 'yes', kind of like a dazed reporter interviewing Charles Oakley for the first time.....

Poor Antoine Walker is heading to the Atlanta Hawks. Just a few years ago he was with Boston, playing against the New Jersey Nets for a chance to go to the NBA Finals and now he's off to the ATL. Not since I found out Dexter Manley couldn't read or write have I felt so sorry for a player. We will see Haley's Comet before we see the Hawks in the postseason (no offense to Coach Woodson). At least they're easy to scout, all you have to do is watch video tape of that team that plays against the Harlem Globetrotters.

Do you all remember Maciej Lampe? (well you shouldn't) In the 2003 NBA draft, he was the last guy left in the green room, and was finally taken by the New York Knicks with the first pick of the second round. Well, he's now a member of the Phoenix Suns and in a recent interview he told a reporter he thinks he can be an All-Star one day. Right, and I will circle the globe in a hang glider. You see, it's nice to think these things, but we really shouldn't say them out loud.

Finally, I am enlisting help from all the Dante's Speak followers. I oftentimes will pop in a video of Chris Webber calling a timeout in the NCAA Championship game against North Carolina. This is extremely entertaining to me, I'll make popcorn watch the whole game, and sure enough, EVERY TIME, he calls that timeout. Well, we all know that was embarassing AND humorous, but is it the MOST embarassing moment in basketball history? If not, what is? Let's have some fun and I will be posting your answers next week.

Dante welcomes your comments, questions and alternative opinions. E-mail him here.

Dante’s Speak is solely the opinion of Dante Marchitelli and does not reflect the views of the Orlando Magic or the NBA. Marchitelli has served as radio producer in the Orlando Magic's Broadcast department for six seasons. He also enjoy movies, long strolls on the beach and is a Taurus.