Nov 6 2012 3:19PM

Vote The Rock!


Christian Petersen/NBAE/Getty Images

Obama or Romney … Romney, Obama … Potato, tomato.

It's all the same to me, Man, so I’d rather vote on my NBA All-Star ballot, even though the ballots have not been officially released yet.

While we're on the subject, I might as well vote on all the NBA awards, since we are now one week into the 2012-13 season.

Let's rock the vote, NBA-style, shall we?

ALL-STAR

West Starters

Dwight Howard, Lakers … I'm voting for my brother D-How unless he gets another coach fired.

Tim Duncan, Spurs … The greatest player of the 21st Century should never be left off an All-Star team again. Nobody puts Baby in a corner.

Kevin Durant, Thunder … I think KD should grow a beard to show the world OKC doesn't miss Harden … even though it does.

James Harden, Rockets … The Vampire Killer left the Thunderdome for his Mad Max contract and proved to be worth every dollar.

Chris Paul, Clippers … CP3 turned Lob City into Lob Movement when the team attracted Jamal Crawford, Grant Hill and Lamar Odom as free agents.

West Reserves

Marc Gasol, Grizzlies … Marc made his All-Star debut in 2012, but it will mean so much more to play alongside big brother Pau in All-Star Game 2013.

Pau Gasol, Lakers … With Dirk Nowitzki and Kevin Love hurt, Pau just might get his rightful spot on the West team again.

Blake Griffin, Clippers … It wouldn't be an All-Star Weekend if you didn't have a true time traveler in the group.

Kobe Bryant, Lakers … He's not the all-around ball dominator like before, but more-efficient Kobe is very much an All-Star.

Manu Ginobili, Spurs … Put Manu on another team like Harden, and he would have put up glossy numbers like the Sixth Man with more facial and cranial hair.

Tony Parker, Spurs … I put the Spur on my list only because I want to be invited to Tony's exclusive cook-outs.

Russell Westbrook, Thunder … All-Star Weekend is also about fashion, and the game wouldn't be the same without Russ' frames.

East Starters

Kevin Garnett, Celtics … He's the best center in the East at playoff time, so there's no way I'm leaving KG off my ballot, even though fans and coaches do.

Chris Bosh, Heat … Bosh plays, Heat wins. Bosh plays, East has a chance to win.

LeBron James, Heat … Oh, what I would give to hear The Champ mic'd up in the East locker room all week long.

Dwyane Wade, Heat … The Big 3's senior leader is always in All-Star form, whether he's 100-percent healthy or not.

Deron Williams, Nets … If his ankles are still holding his body up, D-Will finds a way on this All-Star team.

East Reserves

Roy HIbbert, Pacers … I don't know how healthy Andrew Bynum will be (I say that every year), but I do know what Hibbert gives me: All-Star center play.

Josh Smith, Hawks … Give the man his spot in an All-Star Game already! It's his free-agent year! Have a heart.

Carmelo Anthony, Knicks … Melo, you can be an All-Star as long as you play power forward. None of this weak small-forward stuff.

Paul Pierce, Celtics … Pierce played his first All-Star Game in 2002, and is the only player from that East squad still starring on his conference team.

Luol Deng, Bulls … Deng can stay in the All-Star Game as long as he promises not to play any of that devastating D of his.

Joe Johnson, Nets … Brooklyn Joe has a nice All-Star ring to it.

Rajon Rondo, Celtics … Rondo keeps the Big 3 alive in Boston.

Kyrie Irving, Cavaliers … He's only 20, but soon Kyrie will have as much game as his Uncle Drew.

MVP

1. LeBron James, Heat … It’s not even close. They should rename the MVP award the LBJ award.

2. Chris Paul, Clippers … The 27-year-old point guard is in his prime and is ready to steal the MVP trophy, should anything happen to LeBron.

3. Kevin Durant, Thunder … The Thunder franchise--in this post-Harden phase--is now squarely placed on Durant's narrow, sturdy shoulders.

4. Tim Duncan, Spurs … Box-score stats don't do him justice; advanced stats show Duncan is still a king.

5. Dwight Howard, Lakers … One day Howard and Paul will run for mayor of L.A. … and I have no idea who will win that election.

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR

1. Anthony Davis, Hornets … Everyone is united that Unibrow is ROY.

2. Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, Bobcats … MKG is no kid on the court, even though he just turned 19.

3. Damian LIllard, Trail Blazers … Lil Lillard sure knows how to pick-and-roll.

COACH OF THE YEAR

1. Tom Thibodeau, Bulls … The man could win 50 NBA games with D-Leaguers.

2. Gregg Popovich, Spurs … Pop won his first COY last year and it really should have been his 73rd.

3. Doc Rivers, Celtics … He's not a doctor; he just plays a miracle worker on TV.

MOST IMPROVED

1. Kawhi Leonard, Spurs … The Man of Steal leaps All-Rookie seasons in a single bound.

2. Omer Asik, Rockets … The Great Wall is still in Houston.

3. Al Farouq-Aminu, Hornets … Al Farouq-Aminu translates in English to "no-nonsense man on path to success."

SIXTH MAN

1. Manu Ginobili, Spurs … When I think of bench, I think of Johnny, Forrest Gump, Red Auerbach statue … and Manu from Heaven.

2. Ray Allen, Heat … I don't blame Allen for leaving his Big 3 for a better Big 3.

3. Jamal Crawford, Clippers … Even Kobe must say, "Man, that guy shoots a lot."

DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR

1. Luol Deng, Bulls … Deng puts the "go" in Chicago D.

2. Kevin Garnett, Celtics … KG is cagey.

3. Tim Duncan, Spurs … If Timmy were a superhero, he'd be the one that takes away other heroes' powers.

ALL-DEFENSE

First Team

Tim Duncan, Spurs … Nobody has a better defensive RAPM than the 36-year-old basketball wonder.

Kevin Garnett, Celtics … I don't think No. 5 in the Celtic green is Kevin Garnett. I think it's really Bill Russell.

Luol Deng, Bulls … If ever a defensive-first player merited MVP consideration, it is the one who runs the Bulls' D.

Andre Iguodala, Nuggets … Holla for 'Dala if you like D in Denver.

Tony Allen, Grizzlies … Allen was meant to lead the Grizzlies because he's both grizzled and grizzly.

Second Team

Dwight Howard, Lakers … What Howard lacks in defensive acumen (goaltendings, rejecting shots into the stands, etc.), he makes up for with defensive passion.

Anthony Davis, Hornets … ESPN Fantasy projects Davis to block 2.5 shots per game; that's what Duncan did his rookie season 15 years ago.

Taj Gibson, Bulls … What other big gets paid $8-to-$10 million annually to average 20 minutes off the bench?

Kawhi Leonard, Spurs … Kawhi at age 21 is as good on D as Scottie Pippen was at age 25.

Chris Paul, Clippers … CP3 is always barking at officials, but his defensive bite on opposing point guards is far more severe.