 Pat Garrity: Don’t ask him to do your taxes
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Straight Shooter| Off the court, do most people just assume you're a basketball player because of your 6-9 height? Who do you get mistaken for? | After the requisite, “You’re so tall!” followed by an uneasy moment while the person stares at you, most people my height can expect to be asked if they play basketball. Incidentally, I’ve been in the elevator with my teammates on our way to shoot around, and people will ask, “Do you play basketball?”—even though we’re all in our Magic-issued gear. I’m usually accommodating and answer truthfully, although if I’m in a bad mood and don’t feel like talking, I’ll tell the person that I’ve never played and I’m an accountant. They will then suggest that I should have played, to which I will usually agree, but counter that I was always better with numbers. I’ve found that the conversation then comes to a quick halt. The only potential danger to this strategy is when the person asking is a real accountant and wants to talk shop. This hasn’t happened, but if it did, I plan on replying that I hate my job and am looking to make a career move. |
| Is it true that NBA players are fans of daytime television—soap operas, Judge Judy, The View, etc? | I imagine some players are but I’d have to say that I’m more a fan of the trash talk show genre. It’s become standard that we watch Springer or Maury in the training room while icing. Both come on at the same time so we usually start with Springer and then flip to Maury in time for the DNA test results to come back. We watch up until the mother finds out the man on stage is not the father and runs backstage crying. Maury will then console her and that is usually the time we flip back to Springer. If we’re lucky, that will be about the time that the guests have stripped down to their boxers and begin to fight. Did I mention that I did graduate from college? |
| What kind of things do opponents say to you while shooting free throws? | There’s not a lot of talking during free throws but if someone does talk to the shooter, it is often something like, “Good foul!” or “Box out!” meaning the foul shooter is going to miss and there will be a rebound. I did have a ref once bet me a Coke that I’d miss. I didn’t—and he still hasn’t paid me. I’m thinking about reporting him to Commissioner Stern. |
| If players don't see any action during a game, do they still take a shower afterwards? | Generally speaking, most players shower after the game whether or not they see any time. The reason for this is that most guys workout on the floor before the game and those who aren’t in the rotation might even be required to put in 30 minutes or so of cardio after the game. I’ve been in locker rooms where players are upset with their time and go straight from uniform to street clothes without showering—also known as “taking a shower pill.” It is rare, though, and often accompanied by an appropriate amount of hazing by that player’s teammates for lack of attention to personal hygiene. |
| Do you have any unusual pregame rituals? What's the strangest ritual you've observed by a teammate? | My pregame rituals probably aren’t what one would consider strange. I usually eat the same thing at the same time before the game (pasta, chicken breast, fruit), and then go through the same pregame shot routine about an hour before tipoff. The strangest thing I’ve seen is the way some guys eat before games. I’ve seen guys downing McDonald’s Filet-O-Fishes, hot dogs, nachos, cheeseburgers... |
| Your dunk against Philadelphia last season was surprising; what were you thinking afterwards? | After that dunk, I was jacked. You can tell by how fast I ran back on defense, along with the semi-shocked/dazed look on my face. Believe it or not, I actually did dunk a lot in college, but hadn’t had a dunk like that in a long time. |
From the Nov/Dec 2006 issue
