Thursday, November 30, 2006
Online Chat With Clippers Season Ticket Holder and ESPN.com’s "The Sports Guy" Bill Simmons
 Simmons |
Simmons is also the reigning champ of the NBA Cares Celebrity Fantasy League and is undefeated so far this season.
Check out The Sports Guy's website for anything you might have missed.
Please note: Mr. Simmon's thoughts and opinions are his and his alone. In no way do they necessarily reflect those of the Los Angeles Clippers organization. (But we listen to him anyway because he's a citizen of the Clipper Nation.)
Bill Simmons: All right, I'm here... let's get to work.
Brian: Cherry Hill, NJ: If Clips remain around .500 and 76ers going into tank, any chance for an Iverson for Livingston, Maggette, & Cap Filler deal? The 76'ers can also throw Webber in for the rights to Bill Fitch.
Bill Simmons: I am hoping this happens because the Clips don't have a clear-cut go-to-guy other than Sam, and they learned last spring that you can't count on a guy in his late-30's to keep winning playoff games for you.
Bill Simmons: Iverson makes a ton of sense because they could give up Maggette and Mobley, plus Paul Davis (who has some trade value I think, he looks like a decent young center) - I can't imagine Philly doing better than that unless they deal with Chicago or Atlanta. They're not going to want to take back bad contracts for Iverson and Maggette/Mobley have two of the more reasonable contracts in the league.
Tony, Los Angeles: I keep hearing Maggette for Dunleavy Jr. Have you heard this? What are your thoughts?
Bill Simmons: That's not happening - Maggette is a much better player than Dunleavy. The first one-for-one name I've heard rumored that makes sense is Mike Miller - he would solve LA's 3-point shooting problems. Then again, Tim Thomas was supposed to do that.
Kenny (Fullerton): If you had to choose between Bynum and Kaman for the next three years, who do you take?
Bill Simmons: I'd take Bynum - as much as I enjoy Kaman, he's a bad defensive player and too spotty from night to night, I never would have signed him to that extension. Why not make him play for it? It also makes him much more difficult to trade now.
The DZA (Santa Barbara): Bill, your the best, keep up the great work. Since you have good seats, who is the biggest trash talker for the Clips and what is the best line you've heard?
Bill Simmons: Cassell is the best trash-talker, he rips on everybody and he's always interacting with opponents and refs. The problem is that the Clips are always piping in music during dead ball spots and you can never hear the players unless you're sitting courtside. So this would be a better question for Billy Crystal or any of the middle-aged guys who sit there with trophy wives who are half their age.
Kenny (Fullerton): If Kaman has to pick between a Wetzel's Pretzel and Cinnabon, which does he take?
Bill Simmons: I think he'd order the Wetzel's Pretzel, then walk away forgetting to pay for it.
Justin (Rochester, NY): Sports Guy, you need to upgrade your seats and become our Jack Nicholson.
Bill Simmons: Would I have to wear sunglasses indoors? I couldn't do that. I need to write a crappy hit sitcom to afford courtside seats. And don't think I'm not thinking about it.
Ryan (Torrance): Who does Sports Gal think is the hottest player in the NBA? Morrison? Shelden Williams?
Bill Simmons: She really likes Kyle Korver because he looks like Kutcher. That's her favorite. She demands to go to every Sixers game.
Aaron (Los Angeles): Does the 5 game losing streak show that the Clippers are still a group of guys that can't close out games?
Bill Simmons: Absolutely. And you have to point the finger at Dunleavy as well - the team has collapsed in too many 4th quarters this season.
JJ(KC): I know it's early, but the Clips are off to a slow start. Is it a little too early to begin worrying about the Clips chances of making the playoffs? Also, I heard Jimmy King on Rome today and he was none too happy about your Burger Flippin' comment in your Leastern Conference article. He said he is a financial advisor for Merrill Lynch. I found it strange that he had time to call The Jim Rome show in the middle of the day as a financial planner, but who am I to judge.
Bill Simmons: All I know is that I have enraged Isiah Thomas, Doc Rivers and Jimmy King in the same calendar year. I couldn't be prouder.
Michael (Simi Valley): Will this be a marathon like your chats on the mother ship? I have to make plans for leaving work later if it will be.
Bill Simmons: Nope, this one's an hour.
Matt G. (Toronto): I'm sure you'll ignore any non-Clips questions but I have this: You took a huge dump on the Raptors this week (but their record is severely deflated by a brutal west coast trip). If they beat the Celtics and Knicks this weekend would you pop them ahead? I don't agree they are as bad as you say and I think the impending TJ Ford injury would let Calderon shine...
Bill Simmons: The Toronto fans are great - they have been complaining nonstop since yesterday's column. That's a top-5 fan base right there. I based that Raps prediction on the fact that Ford will inevitably get hurt and they are going to probably throw Bargnani out there for 35-40 minutes a game so he can make his mistakes... and don't think Colangelo isn't smart enough to subtly tank the last 6 weeks for Oden or Durant. I just feel like they have the best chance of tanking down the stretch and making it not seem too obvious.
Matt (Alhambra, CA): Bill, I am a huge fan of yours. I wanted to get your thoughts on the Clippers broadcasting team, Lawler and Smith. I find them to be wildly entertaining and think that Ralph might be a better play by play man than a couple of Los Angeles broadcasting legends that will remain nameless. Then again I don't care for baseball and hate the Lakers, so what do I know?
Bill Simmons: I like the Lawler-Smith tandem a lot. One of the better local tandems in the league.
Dan (Ottawa): Bill...please explain to me why the Raptors are any worse than the Celtics?
Bill Simmons: I'm not sure they are. There are 10-11 teams in the East that legitimately stink.
Dave (Eerie PA): Who gets custody of PamRock's fantasy team? Are they DQ'd? A lot of Pistons on that team...
Bill Simmons: They're agreeing to share custody.
Acorn (New York, NY): SG, what is the buzz in LA over Sofoklis Schortsanitis? He looked great in the World Championships and could definitely give the Clips 12-14 tough minutes off the bench to spell both Brand and Kaman.
Bill Simmons: I'd say the buzz is somewhere between "tepid" and "you could hear the crickets chirping." But you're right, nobody's talking about it. This is another reason I don't think they should have extended Kaman - the Greek kid might become their version of Bynum next year.
Bill Simmons: I just can't wait to hear Bob Cousy try to say his name during a Celts-Clips game.
Mike (Scranton): This chat is ridiculous. All you talk about is the Clippers. I'll contribute to your chats again when you start to realize that there are 30 teams in the NBA, not just the Clippers. Sorry Sports Guy. You just lost a fan.
Bill Simmons: Um, this is a Clippers chat. It's on Clippers.com. That's the reason we're having it. Don't make me send Joe Safety after you.
Dave (LA): Hey Bill, which team has surprised you the most? Which guy did you have to see in person to know he was legit?
Bill Simmons: Golden State. I thought they would stink because I couldn't imagine how you could win more than 35 games with Baron Davis, Troy Murphy and Mike Dunleavy, Jr. as 3 of your top 4 guys. But nobody had any idea what they had in Biedrins and Ellis. Those guys are legitimate studs and I think if you compare them to Kaman-Livingston, they're just more productive right now.
David (Pomona): Hey Bill, who is your favorite Clippers Spirit dancer? You know you have one.
Bill Simmons: Are you trying to get me divorced? Jeez, I almost answered this... I'm an idiot...
Tommy (Pasadena, CA): On a scale of 1-10, how terrified are you of Joe Safety? Seriously.
Bill Simmons: Probably a 27.
Greg (MN): I agree with your KG/Minnesota column completely, unfortunately, and think we should spare him and let him leave. The only problem is how does a team go about doing this? No GM (even McHale) wants to be the guy that traded KG because they are afraid people will kill them when he succeeds somewhere else. How do you come out the other end ok?
Bill Simmons: See, this is the guy I think the Clips should pursue - if you dangled Kaman, Maggette, the Zeljko/Korolev contracts and the rights to the Greek Kid, I feel like the TWolves would have to consider it. You know, assuming McHale is still awake.
James ( Manchester NH): Bill gives us the odds on the following players being moved by the trade deadline: KG, Pierce, and AI
Bill Simmons: AI - Off the board. They're guaranteed to trade him.
KG - 3-2
PP - 7-1
Majeed: Can the Lakers get KG for Odom and Kwame? I don't think they should trade Bynum. He could end up being a superstar for 10+ years!
Bill Simmons: I think it would have to be Odom and Bynum. Minny doesn't need to get 4 guys for him, they already have too many guys. They need someone who can replace 80% of his stats (in this case, Odom) and a potential All-Star for the future (in this case, Bynum), plus picks.
Erik (Chapel Hill): What do you think it will take to push the Clips over the top? They're strong at every position and even have a good bench (Maggette, Livingston, Thomas). Does Livingston need to make The Leap or will they have to make trades to get to the Finals?
Bill Simmons: They need to make a 3-for-1 deal either for KG or a crunch-time guy, whether it's Ray Allen, Pierce, Iverson... doesn't matter. They need someone who can score in the last 3 minutes of a game.
Justin (Rochester): Do you expect any hostility from neighboring season ticket holders on the 27th when you go Daniel Stern/Dan Akroyd all game?
Bill Simmons: I won't sit in my seats for the Clips-Celts game, I think it's wrong to do that. I'm going to sit somewhere else or get a press pass.
Thomas (Culver City): Is Tim Thomas secretly still playing for the Suns?
Bill Simmons: Maybe mentally... it's hard to tell. I'm about 2 more weeks from kicking myself for thinking that he was anyone other than someone who should be paid year to year.
Jay(Dallas): What are the chances the Clips trade Maggette? How come he doesn't get much playing time, is he in Dunleavy's doghouse?
Bill Simmons: Extremely high. The thing is, he should absolutely be the No. 1 perimeter scorer for an NBA team. he could score 23-25 a game every night. and he always plays hard. I don't think he's a 6th man, and I wonder if his ceiling is destiny is being someone who puts up great stats on a 30-win team, ala Marbury, Randolph, Joe Johnson and others.
Doug (Los Angeles): Is it time to give up on Livingston making "the leap"? So far he's averaging the same minutes as last year, but slightly less productive in scoring, assists and rebounds. Is it just not going to happen?
Bill Simmons: Keep the faith, he's only 21 years old. Part of the problem is the coaching - for instance, they didn't post him up once last night against Chucky Atkins, that's just insane. The Grizz would have had to double every time.
Ryan (Bakersfield): What did you think about the way the Celtics blew that game last night? What was Wally doing driving to the paint - down by three - with roughly three seconds on the clock? Could they have handled that situation any more poorly than they did?
Bill Simmons: No. It's impossible. I have said my piece about the Celts... the problems are obvious and nothing more needs to be said.
Brian (NYC): Who's a guy to go out and trade for, fantasy-wise? On any team.
Bill Simmons: I think T-Mac is about to heat up. That's one guy I like. Also like Billups to heat up. Mo Williams. Bogut. I can't see Arenas stinking for the entire season. Bargnani could be a sleeper since it looks like they might play him. Bassy Telfair is coming on.
Majeed: Lakers/Clips this Saturday: Who wins round 2?
Bill Simmons: I will not believe that the Clips will beat the Lakers until I attend a game when it actually happens. Those Clips-Lakers are great though - love the tension between the disgruntled Clips fans and the pissy/condescending Lakers fans. It's really fantastic. Like seeing preppie college kids walk into a bar filled with bitter townies.
Colin (Knoxville): If Vince Carter does not resign with nets do you think the Clippers will be interested in Vince?
Bill Simmons: I sure hope not... after watching him closely last night against the Celts, he looks like he's headed towards Webber-land soon. They couldn't hide him on defense. Whoever signs VC this summer will be regretting it within 6 months.
Joel (St. Louis): It's been nearly ten minutes. Say something about Donald Sterling already!
Bill Simmons: I like the way he dresses. Always looks like he's about to host a screening in the screening room of his mansion, but he's waiting until Bob Evans and Ali McGraw get there.
ray (DC) : Hello. If Ray Allen was made available, would Cuttino, Maggs, and Singleton do the trick?
Bill Simmons: I sure hope so. Ray Allen would be the ideal guy for the Clips, I really think he makes the most sense. I would offer Maggette, Mobley and the rights to the Greek kid.
Jesse (LA): You seem to be moving up the ranks in Clipperville...how long until they make you VP of Common Sense? What move would you change had you had that position...Dunleavy or Kaman?
Bill Simmons: My answer is C) both
Dan (Boston): Any chats coming up on Celtics.com? Or will Doc not allow that?
Bill Simmons: Are you kidding? I would love it. I think you have a better chance of Perez Hilton hosting a chat on Britney Spears' Web site though.
Chris (Valencia, CA): If Raja Bell is Bruce Bowen after four beers, then who is Quinton Ross?
Bill Simmons: He's Bruce Bowen after 3 lemonades.
Bryan (Wilmore KY): So is Elgin Baylor off limits today? What gives?
Bill Simmons: You mean, the 2006 Executive of the Year? Of course not... nobody asked me a question about him.
Thomas (Culver City): How do your colleagues at ESPN treat you since you've become a Clipper fan? And when are you going to be in one of those hilarious SportsCenter commercials already?
Bill Simmons: I'm a Celtics fan. I just happen to own Clippers tickets because they were the closest NBA team to my house.
Scott (GA): Give us your back page blurb on the new Phoenix Suns book.....
Bill Simmons: "McCallum does it again!" I did like the book... a little disjointed, but enough in there that it was worth a read if you love the NBA.
Frankie Muniz (L.A.): Who is stronger...me or Livingston?
Bill Simmons: I can't decide.
David (Pomona): Hey Bill, which celebrity "fan" have you ever been most surprised to see at a Clippers game?
Bill Simmons: Probably last night - Marcia Strassman, the lady who played Gabe Kaplan's wife in Welcome Back Kotter. And she looked fantastic! That one stunned me. Second place would be porn star Mary Carey. Third place would be Kyle from Real World: Chicago, who has sat in my section a couple times wearing a Brand jersey.
Eno: When do the Jazz come back to earth? Do they have any chance of making a deep run come playoff time?
Bill Simmons: No way. I think they snuck up on everyone in November. That won't last.
Mike (San Diego): Bill, true fan. A buddy of mine is whining that you called Lakers fans pissy and condescending. What can I say to him about this?
Bill Simmons: Just at Clippers games. That's how they act. I'm telling you.
Thomas (Culver City): What do you think changed Donald Sterling's mind about how to run the team? Do you think Stern told him to shape up or ship out?
Bill Simmons: I think he realized that he could actually make MORE money by spending 30% more on coaches and players. It's not like he's Mr. Moneybags now and throwing millions around like Mark Cuban. He won't even break ground on the new practice facility. But he's spending money on players and that's good.
Tony, Los Angeles: I've been to Lakers games, the fans are pissy and condescending all the time. Don't make excuses for them. They suck.
Bill Simmons: Okay.
PK (Newport Beach): Bill, if you're Shaun Livingston, what do you think of walking the ball up the court, passing it to the wing, and going and standing in the corner? Shouldn't they go up-tempo when Livingston's in?
Bill Simmons: Hell yes. This has been the most frustrating thing of the past 2 seasons for me. They are constantly reining him in.
Dave(Philly): A+ to the Clippers for having the stones to have this uncensored chat. 76ers would pass all your responses through the twins from Good Morning Vietnam...
Bill Simmons: I agree - the Clippers have an incredibly cool organization, I have been constantly surprised about this for 3 straight years.
Justin (Philly): Have the Clips presented you with your own jersey that says "BassBowl" on the back yet?
Bill Simmons: I’m anxiously waiting....
Bill Simmons (LA): You can now buy my new book, "Now I Can Die In Peace", though Amazon.com
Bill Simmons: Ha ha... very funny...
Allen (Utah): Why do you think an L.A. person becomes a Lakers fan instead of a Clippers fan and vice versa? Are Clippers fans to Red Sox fans what Lakers fans are to Yankees fans?
Bill Simmons: That's simple - it really comes down to whether or not you have a soul.
Jon (Los Angeles): Do you think the Clippers should stay at the Staples Center or move to some place like Anaheim or Carson?
Bill Simmons: I vote for staying at the Staples. It's a great arena, not sure why they would leave. if they move to Anaheim, they might as well move to Mexico or Cuba.
Matt (Denver): Bill, is Elton Brand waiting for the light to go on again? Maybe hurt? Maybe pacing himself? I can't figure him out yet.
Bill Simmons: I think EB played a 95-game season through the end of May, followed by the World Championships, and he's just worn out... he looks banged up and a step slow to me. Last night was the first night he looked like himself. He'll be fine. Don't worry about him unless he's killing your fantasy team.
Aaron (San Gabriel, CA): Do you think the Clippers are too deep for their own good?
Bill Simmons: Yes, I worried about this before the season and even wrote as much. Depth is great, but you never want to have 7-8 guys who all think they should be finishing a game. It's really only worked for a title once in the past 25 years - with the Pistons in '89 and '90, and the Clips have nobody like Isiah on this team to rein everyone in.
Bill Simmons: All right everyone - that's it for me. Thanks to everyone who sent in questions and don't forget to keep reading my column at ESPN.com!
